Why does the phrase "fuck you with a baseball bat" kinda turn me on?

Everyone needs at least one photo of titties in their phone

Human penis or limited edition lightsaber vibrator?

A good reason to never be over weight, you ever watch silence of the lambs?

Whoever thought up putting pizza in pornography is a fucking genius

Mom, if you stick four penises into a woman's vagina then stand over and pee on her, is that love too?

before the internet there was sex

Nothing reminds me of my first time better than a guy screaming RAPE. I yelled suprise first though

Ever have sex with someone then hope your preggers after? THATS how awesome sex should be

Everyone knows that if at the end of the year if jesus isnt scared by his shadow we are safe

To get rid of people il tell em im 17. Too old for an offender

either facebook is down or my shit got deleted again for posting bestiality porn

Ever been like, WTF I DIDNT HAVE TOAST? Should probably wash my hands more often

If you dont yell WONDER TWIN POWERS ACTIVATE when you penetrate a chick, i dont need to know you

Finishing bizness 'fore your leg falls asleep is #winning

there isnt a single human being that has befriended me that didnt have to have "a talk" about me to one of their superiors

Every person born in november is a result of the guy's valentines present

DAMMIT i just read an email inviting me to a mothers day party. Thats the perfect time to dress up a coat hanger

Cant believe i survived the first five years of school without the internet or the cellular phone...all i had was sega

Bet i can fit eight ice cubes in my vagina