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Why does the phrase "fuck you with a baseball bat" kinda turn me on?
Everyone needs at least one photo of titties in their phone
Human penis or limited edition lightsaber vibrator?
A good reason to never be over weight, you ever watch silence of the lambs?
Whoever thought up putting pizza in pornography is a fucking genius
Mom, if you stick four penises into a woman's vagina then stand over and pee on her, is that love too?
before the internet there was sex
Nothing reminds me of my first time better than a guy screaming RAPE. I yelled suprise first though
Ever have sex with someone then hope your preggers after? THATS how awesome sex should be
Everyone knows that if at the end of the year if jesus isnt scared by his shadow we are safe
To get rid of people il tell em im 17. Too old for an offender
either facebook is down or my shit got deleted again for posting bestiality porn
Ever been like, WTF I DIDNT HAVE TOAST? Should probably wash my hands more often
If you dont yell WONDER TWIN POWERS ACTIVATE when you penetrate a chick, i dont need to know you
Finishing bizness 'fore your leg falls asleep is #winning
there isnt a single human being that has befriended me that didnt have to have "a talk" about me to one of their superiors
Every person born in november is a result of the guy's valentines present
DAMMIT i just read an email inviting me to a mothers day party. Thats the perfect time to dress up a coat hanger
Cant believe i survived the first five years of school without the internet or the cellular phone...all i had was sega
Bet i can fit eight ice cubes in my vagina
Bloodhound Gang, Rucka Rucka Ali and dongcopter pirate enthusiast. I love dinosaur porn movies and hate going out. Go fuck yourself.