Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
I pray for a world where people are more tolerant of lactose.
I always use the porn superstore as a landmark when giving directions to the elderly.
I got a new plant, I shall name it Robert.
I wonder how long it would take to actually nickel and dime someone to death.
WHAT DO WE WANT?
A time machine!!!
WHEN DO WE WANT IT?
Yeah, well, that's really fucking Irrelevant.
Its a good thing I learned Hackey Sack when I was younger, it lessens the blow every time I drop my phone.
By the looks of my Favstar page, I should have joined Twitter Jr.
I swear I could have been a millionaire if Mrs. Pac Man was a sport, or was never invented.
Just gave myself a pearl bracelet. :)
Just stole some Klondike Bars cause fuck doing shit.
My neighbors are never amused when I put three beer bottles on my finger tips and invite them to "come out to plaaayaaay"
My touchdown dance would be scraping my ass on the ground in the endzone like a dog.
My phone battery died. I am now bound by cord, like most of my sexual partners.
Are qualms a side effect of something? Because I have a lot of them.
Why can't I ever find these backpacks full of coke that wash up on the beach? You wouldn't see a news report about it.
If you don't follow me back, I will UNFOLLOW your ASS!! and put you in a list, I'm just warning you. Wait, you can't see this can you. :(
Tebow will rise in three days and win that game.
I looked up at my microwave to check the time, it said END.
Personally, I don't give a fuck. Unless I'm horny, which is most of the time so this is kind of a pointless tweet.
Never trust this hooker that just offered me a rebate.