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  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    Non smokers look down on smokers. Smokers look down on paan masala chewers. Masala chewers don't look at all & spit on shoes of non smokers.

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    ThePrateekKhareMeghna_MalikNaatakCompanyuh_like_iDunnoTheAmolPatiltiklemypikle69SorryShaktimannYuu_Dee
    • 1,101
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    aawaaaraDOTexeplagiaristtMorning_SiestaFightingItOutTheAmolPatilliberatedsoul12vj_04iOS_Tweets
  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    In a GD we were asked to say a few words about 'Sex'.. so I said 'Ladies and Gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure.' and sat down.

    • 487
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    wildgod1sk00monuInduSarabhaiInsane_chorristfu_veerOpportunis_TMAKKARROMAImcji__
    • 825
    • RETWEETS
    Unilitresk00monuInduSarabhaiEarthlingtonInsane_chorriBurgerrBsweetisadanaMAKKARROMA
    mihirmodiscratchysinghcholesteroILoKarloFollow
  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    If I ever have a daughter, when she's grown up, I will show her "Taken" & say, "Make smart life choices because I can't do shit like that!"

    • 235
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    sachi_bbsronlynow_rohantwistedmind2409shivanimehra86amitpallathThatVividSmokesk00monuBucketheadCase
    • 489
    • RETWEETS
    B_Kamna_WillMissFuzzyBootsdeadmoosbyakrii_pcsyvianonlynow_rohanamitpallathjacknjohnnie
    LazerPunchabbeyaar
  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    Absence is important. Even the most intoxicating perfume loses its charm after a while because of its mere constant presence.

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    iamDhruvRaishi3489NamitaTheBaluFloyd_architecturizeWahiyat_PJsKattuGilehriA_Anthwal
    • 375
    • RETWEETS
    BurgerrBthetinyshotvodkariousiabhijayveil_insanitygunaphysicsKattuGilehricatAshtrophe_
    TinyMarkTwainSTUPIDiesm
  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    Dear parents,
    Investment in your children are subject to market risks. Please read the "chaar log kya kahenge?" document carefully.

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    winquishNotTheIssuejazzmatazz23aftabnizzlashkaryHarshdeepParmarTheGhostRider31BakwasRadio
    • 393
    • RETWEETS
    meetvora_daisyjalodhiawinquishNuclear__BananaATBakwaasdillidikudiinehatiharaRollMe_one
  • Psilosophy
    • 167
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    TrishantDevvarun_chakroaalsi_slothGreekFraudkhooni_murgaBimbilikibilebigautam_k_Jhabra_696
    • 330
    • RETWEETS
    iKatoliciousSajHossainAnkur2501HumourMinistervarun_chakromanthankhokhaniaalsi_slothkhooni_murga
  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    When they finally learn to live without you, let them.

    • 211
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    puffinfinity3PegsDownmmsimplyrasaksenaPrakaashLmaddyy08FakeWingerTheOfficialBhai
    • 283
    • RETWEETS
    MONkeyBaateinSatanKiNaniFictionalkudiTheMentalistzzOfficialHarshaRollMe_one_3rdDecanBakwasRadio
  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    You and I, we are like cigarettes and cancer, rats and plagues, women and madness. Not necessarily linked, but tainted into togetherness.

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    SrishtiJain20Meghna_MalikTheAshish_GargTheAmolPatilinksanity_timPagliKahiKiiirapunzerrmanmeetk1003
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    SrishtiJain20NagraTwinklereetikssauvisinghraghav_arorainksanity_timPagliKahiKiiihardikcj_patel
    mihirmodi
  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    If websites were women, IRCTC would be your mom.

    "Mom can I.."

    "NO"

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    Kirak_Admijunaidxenoghanta_gyananishrpillaivishwakandalaKirtikaChandanicatAshtrophe_CaptainShishir
    • 307
    • RETWEETS
    reetamimKirak_Admistfu_veersom_160shilpabansaljunaidxenoanirudh_arsenalscorpioyadav
  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    Every girl wants a Raj. Then cries foul when it turns out to be a Thackeray.

    • 128
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    MissPeepToesJeyenthVTheGhostRider31dukkarrNamitaThemuh_phattChapariaAvishekAnkita05Sharma
    • 296
    • RETWEETS
    sohinimaitrasanket0087rajs51MohMaayaLYT00vijay4103Poseidonunclelahirip
    mihirmodi
  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    Cousin: Bhaiya boards are over. Ab to aish rahegi. Ghar wale bhi kuch nahi bolenge!
    Me: *wipes a tear from eye* Tu saala chutiya hi reh gaya

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    piousdevile_anuragJebagx_sauravsupercolddSoundOfSaadHitesh_MufcMoHitBhati07
  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    Love makes the world go round. Faith can move mountains. Because fuck science.

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  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    If they get your sarcasm, it's a moral victory. If they don't, it's an intellectual victory.

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    ThatVividSmokeAStarOnFireparthparekh91namastey_jiRoad_BuffChaitanyaShivamSandKhajuriaAnusheh98
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  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    Go to Twitter settings. Scroll down to "Your Twitter Archive". Download ALL your tweets. Even your first. DO IT. DO EEEEEET NOW!

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  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    They said I could be anything, so I became a burden on the society.

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    mihirmodi
  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    The secret ingredient in the special chai that you order at the tapri is the tears of the poor Chhotu who could not get an education.

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    • 207
    • RETWEETS
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    mihirmodi
  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    Friend-zone < Bro-zone < "Yaar mera BF kal tere sheher aa raha hai. Usko ghuma de please.."-zone.

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  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    Kashmiri girls are so damn hot man!! No wonder two whole nations are constantly fighting over it.

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  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    I check my phone the way new mothers check to see if their baby is breathing.

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    mihirmodi
  • Psilosophy
      mrdl @Psilosophy

    Don't be an asshole. The government hates competition.

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    Kirak_AdmiBubblyDentistErrendousHumourMinisteraalsi_vellaFirstAidBoxxOjasismRichaDKumar
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@Psilosophy

@Psilosophy

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