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Chris Christie's roll in the Trump administration would be huge.
And that's how you write a subliminal tweet.
Donald Trump's vice presidential pick? There is only one clear choice:
The Cruz/Kasich alliance is like a team-up of evil villains.
What Trump needs now is the ultimate villain on his side:
Omorosa for VP.
Little known fact:
His full name was Jesus H. Goldberg.
Release crying doves? Nope.
Drive a little red corvette? Nope.
Wear a raspberry beret? Nope.
Hey! Wine is purple, right?
Kylie Jenner has the mother of all daddy issues.
Got any tattoos...?
Oh, just one. I left him back on the island.
~ Mr. Roarke on an awkward 1st date.
The Amish rebel grows a mustache cus he's a badass.
~ Deadpool, watching Batman v Superman.
Bald men steal Rogaine.
Hairy women steal Nair.
Showered at my girlfriend's house and didn't tip over any of the 20 shampoo bottles lined around the edge.
Ninja Achievement, UNLOCKED!
My abs look like someone drank all the 6-packs.
Pete Best wondering if the "5th Beatle" position is now available.
RIP George Martin.
Justice Scalia dissents on Life.
My touchdown dance looks like air guitar, but with 12 pizza rolls stuffed in my mouth.
Walks Grandpa into Starbucks*
"in my day, a cup of coffee was a only a nickel!"
...aaand walks Grandpa out of Starbucks*
C'mon...have a laugh.
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