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  • Pulse_NYC
      Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    Though I saw a real-life superhero, but alas...it was just another asshole in a Captain America shield t-shirt.

    • 6
    • FAVS
    HormonellaJandalizetjwimzJustCallMeFrankAvatar_unknown_48Avatar_unknown_48
  • Pulse_NYC
      Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    Men,

    Wondering what Halloween costume to wear that will make women irresistibly attracted to you?

    Dress like a shoe sale.

    • 24
    • FAVS
    Hormonellafaith4verlivesJustLikeMikeelllvvvzzzmrtruthandsouljeffswarensevanrhorneJandalize
    • 11
    • RETWEETS
    lllvvvzzzjeffswarensMMaryfairyJandalizekimwilliamzAvatar_unknown_48Avatar_unknown_48Avatar_unknown_48
  • Pulse_NYC
      Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    Lab-grown penises...?

    Now I know what to give as stocking stuffers for Christmas. Thank you, science!

    • 17
    • FAVS
    Hormonellafaith4verlivesAwesome_Toddjeffreyvanclea1clevergurl78chicnlil1EnchantedMinionJandalize
    • 4
    • RETWEETS
    EnchantedMinionStilettoSuprmomAvatar_unknown_48Avatar_unknown_48
  • Pulse_NYC
      Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    I'm an advocate for yoga because it loosens women up.

    And lord knows I love loose women.

    • 13
    • FAVS
    Hormonellajeffreyvanclea1chicnlil1Weezie76TorriablenycmoonUp2Longkimwilliamz
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    Avatar_unknown_48
  • Pulse_NYC
      Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    Facebook buys WhatsApp for 19 Billion dollars.

    Not to be outdone, Google+ buys Goat Simulator for 100 Trillion dollars.

    • 17
    • FAVS
    Awesome_ToddWittyHendrixJDoody523jeffreyvanclea1chicnlil1HeyZeus666sunset_proHormonella
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    jeffreyvanclea1
  • Pulse_NYC
      Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    Yes I was staring at your tits, but in my defense...tits.

    • 32
    • FAVS
    faith4verlivestexasstalkermombgirl314JDoody523rmbctiousjeffreyvanclea1WickedDarkEyesdoc_shah
    • 13
    • RETWEETS
    bgirl314jeffreyvanclea1chicnlil1mrjohntofuLeggiessStuForRealStilettoSuprmomJamesMikeMorris
  • Pulse_NYC
      Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    This tweet goes out to the hearing impaired:

    👋 🙌 ✋👆👉☝️✊✌️👈 ✋☝

    ️🙈🙉🙊

    • 13
    • FAVS
    faith4verlivesjeffreyvanclea1Hormonellajasminejuliettegrouchie3ElKnuckelhombrePrincessStepfrdZorro3740
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    Weezie76
  • Pulse_NYC
      Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    I could really use a Personality assistant.

    • 43
    • FAVS
    jeffswarensRyan_Patricksjeffreyvanclea1WickedDarkEyeschicnlil1Henry_3kAffinitySparklemrjohntofu
    • 19
    • RETWEETS
    KRISTINB5150jeffreyvanclea1chicnlil1CandaceElaine5wuyuansheng35mrjohntofuBullyJ123Ideal_Victoria
  • Pulse_NYC
     
    Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    @weezie76 - It's, when Gotham meets New York...but that just makes me a bigger geek than you.

    • 1
    • FAV
    Weezie76
  • Pulse_NYC
      Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    Breaking News:

    ISIL, formerly known as NAMBLA, suffers identity crisis.

    • 10
    • FAVS
    HormonellaamyjcordovajeffswarensVirgoSherrychicnlil1Up2Longjeffreyvanclea1CoriTheUnicorn
  • Pulse_NYC
      Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    "That vodka from last night was such a bad girl to you. There, there baby...mommy is gonna make it all better."

    ~ Coffee

    • 27
    • FAVS
    Awesome_ToddHormonellagrouchie3caseytduncanmak718amyjcordovajeffswarensTlaxBoy05
    • 7
    • RETWEETS
    caseytduncanmak718TlaxBoy05Peanut_WyomonicasjunglelovemydogduckMayYouMe18
  • Pulse_NYC
      Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    Sucking in my gut whenever a woman comes near is my superpower.

    • 54
    • FAVS
    Awesome_ToddSpadgerinamrjohntofugrouchie3TrinityKnotTLeggiessPurvoActualHeatherLinnell
    • 23
    • RETWEETS
    devinlonganwuyuansheng35mrjohntofuLeggiesscaseytduncanAskRoxichesterscottyback_samuel
  • Pulse_NYC
      Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    I see a black toe and I wanted painted red.

    She-Hulk green.

    Hold my breath till I'm purple.

    Piss yellow.

    *Rejected nail polish names*

    • 27
    • FAVS
    caseytduncanonume_TlaxBoy05chicnlil1nikhimselff6woz9__shakes31471lovemydogduck
    • 6
    • RETWEETS
    TlaxBoy05shakes31471lovemydogduckbsnc64ShowUrDimplesmalindanina
  • Pulse_NYC
     
    Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    @b_minnie21 - Hate when that happens.

    • 2
    • FAVS
    lovemydogduckb_minnie21
  • Pulse_NYC
      Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    Not saying my wife has a big vagina but she buys her tampons at Sleepy's.

    • 32
    • FAVS
    grouchie3PurvoActualeroxoreDanKCharnleyWeird_RashTlaxBoy05chicnlil1f6woz9__
    • 9
    • RETWEETS
    Weird_RashTlaxBoy05Just4funsasherrymparkerjumpdasharkmjkspeaksUp2LongMattman34
  • Pulse_NYC
      Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    If I convert to Judaism, do I have to give up movies that contain Kevin Bacon?

    • 59
    • FAVS
    grouchie3TlaxBoy05NathanGrandadamTheRealRHBchicnlil1f6woz9__Peanut_Wyokratosfrostbite
    • 13
    • RETWEETS
    grouchie3TlaxBoy05chicnlil1mrtruthandsoullovemydogduckmarebytesJust4funsajumpdashark
  • Pulse_NYC
      Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    I've been chill ever since Frankie told me to Relax.

    • 49
    • FAVS
    marcy_samyjcordovaTlaxBoy05davidamonkcelestinelea90chicnlil1f6woz9__saamz92
    • 14
    • RETWEETS
    TlaxBoy05chicnlil1bsnc64dmc1138marebytesCheetoe4ShowUrDimplesjumpdashark
  • Pulse_NYC
      Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    #1 on the NY Times Best Sellers list this week:

    "At Arm's Length - the unauthorized autobiography of a Selfie"

    (It's a picture book)

    • 30
    • FAVS
    marcy_schicnlil1f6woz9__VirgoSherrymarebytesJustLikeMikeeWeezie76ShowUrDimples
    • 7
    • RETWEETS
    ShowUrDimplesJust4funsaAxenbaneTangltweetsMaxine12333lllvvvzzzTacoTits
  • Pulse_NYC
     
    Pulse @Pulse_NYC

    @stacya600 - Worthy of a typical Facebook status as well.

    • 1
    • FAV
    StacyA600
@Pulse_NYC

@Pulse_NYC

C'mon...have a laugh.