Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
You only need to find a spider in your bed once to give up sleeping forever.
You people and your bae bullshit are stupid as fuck.
My tweets are brought to you by the words "fuck it" and "send."
Bank of America just emailed to let me know it's time to start fucking strangers for money.
Someone just asked if I knew a good joke so I told them about the last five years of my life.
I'm an embarrassment in the streets and a who the fuck knows in the sheets.
I'm one person short of having a relationship status.
There's something incredibly attractive about someone whose life is as much of a disaster as mine.
I just want someone to love me for the miserable bitch that I am.
You have A LOT of free time once you've pushed everyone away from you.
The way I picture or imagine scenarios in my head is never the way shit ends up happening.
The only good thing about being an adult is you can make as many bad decisions as you want.
Laying on the floor, making up fun, new yoga poses. I call this one "downward facing dead body at a crime scene."
Swearing on Twitter is my anti-drug. Come for the cuteness, stay for the rage. I say FUCK! a lot.