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Are being a bitch and having a difficult attitude marketable talents? I'm looking for employment.
If you're hot enough you can totally trick guys into loving you by sending them naked pics of yourself.
It's never too early to make sexually inappropriate advances on your friends.
Ice cream and orgasms for breakfast. Really grabbing adulthood by the balls over here.
I want to run my tongue along every inch of you. Certain inches more than others.
Sorry if I come on too strong, but I'm a former robot turned lunatic and I have no idea how to control my feelings.
The great thing about having feelings is absolutely nothing.
Always make sure to stroke your man's ego. And when you're done stroking it, put his ego in your mouth and suck it until his ego explodes.
Someone needs to issue an Amber Alert for my missing sex life.
If you didn't want me falling in love with you and planning our wedding, you shouldn't have answered your phone, Mr. Customer Service rep.
Let's fall in love all over again. I miss how miserable I made you.
Swearing on Twitter is my anti-drug. Come for the cuteness, stay for the rage. I say FUCK! a lot.
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