"No son, you can't use both feet on the pedals." "But it's easier!" "Walt Jr. I'm just saying that you're *looks into camera* braking bad"

I can Phil it / Collins in the air, tonight / oh lord

@hamsandcastle Bilbo Baggins do not take me for some conjurer of cheap trick. *band appears playing Surrender* goddamnit

8:40 smoke doubleweed

@coolbabyrat but wouldn't a giant shitstain count as a vote for romney

if this tweet gets 1 retweet I will probably tweet some more. I'll probably tweet even if it doesn't though let's be honest

Book™ only for Playstation.

reminder that you have a few hours to go tell someone you are in love with them or confess something and have "april fools" as a safety net

Oh now we put the kids to bed. After tits, animal cruelty and psychedelic drug trips

franch

@cannibalkisses can't spell dangerous without DANG

@cannibalkisses @thesearesongs @breterbies  http://i.imgur.com/8D9zQtf.png 

@daggerbyte make a 6 second video about it. a boVine

@daggerbyte "lysis" means "to separate, split" so if you think about it analysis, anal lysis, it is basically a fancy way to say asscrack

@coolbabyrat @gnarlmarx http://t.co/S3lUgVnt

@schooq You wouldn't kill a policeman. And then steal his hat. And then poop in it. And then send it to his widow. And then steal it again.

@jitka bless you subway. blubway

If I want to know what happened in Europe a long time ago I'd watch Game of Thrones.

@degg there is no big show, just look at his name, BIG SHOW, it's all fake, checkmate atheists

A hero has awoken and it is time to defeat an ancient evil. And then after I vote against Romney I'm gonna play some Halo 4