If this isn't the turning point on guns in America then God help us if we ever see the event that is.

I've got election returns muted on the TV, and I'm blaring the new @mrmfnexquire EP, just like everyone else in America.

I was going to vote for Obama, but I just saw three Romney yard signs in a row and now I am not so sure.

"Call me ASAP. I need to talk about Batman." -A text that I, a 27 year-old adult, just sent.

Should be a great debate tonight between your drunk uncle and your asshole college freshman cousin who just read Atlas Shrugged.

Obama "lost" because he was prepared to debate a conservative and a moderate showed up.

Foursquare updates are basically the Farmville of Twitter.

This one hurt a little. RT @theonion There Are People In World Who Are Concerned About Current State Of Hip-Hop  http://onion.com/17SK46v 

Just RSVP'd for a party on Facebook, at which point FB suggested I invite other people. First suggestion? My grandma. This is why I tweet.

Dude at the gas station blaring Seal "Kiss From a Rose" AND HE LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE SEAL.

My mom un-followed me.

Romney "won" because he abandoned any and all unpopular positions that he and the Republicans have been campaigning on for 2 years.

I'm all for social equality, but people who put ketchup on Chick-Fil-A chicken minis should be treated like the animals they are.

January flew by. Can't believe it's already a week into Febru-any.

But today I'm in a good mood because I am going to be an uncle by the end of the night.

I want to throw a Regular Sweater Christmas party. Only solid colors and tactful patterns allowed.

Saying "we shouldn't politicize this tragedy" politicizes this tragedy.

@hobosrg So then you leave the party with Romney and immediately miss what you gave up.

Anyone know if Halloween falls on a Thursday next year or if it is just the entire month of October again?

I feel like if you can successfully manage 18,000 mp3's you could probably successfully run most businesses and hold any public office.