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You go to an emergency room and cry, "I'm hurt! I'm dying!" and Bernie's supporters are like, "Don't you know these doctors HELP people?"
Motion for all restroom signs to just be the poo emoji
"Don't be so disrespectful! The doctors at this hospital have 50 years experience saving lives"
Dad: I'm going to Wal Mart tomorrow if anyone wants to come
Me: Dad! Why? You're all super union-y.
Dad: I'm going to protest.
It was really considerate of Beyonce to do LEMONADE the day before Game of Thrones so people who sign up for free trial HBO can have both
Since today isn't going great, for every like this tweet gets, I'll tweet 1 thing I like about myself.
Q: How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? A: That's not funny.
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