I'm bitter. I call too many people friends. If you don't call me a friend let me know now so I can stop calling you my friend.

RT @pottermore: RT @iheartspotter: Green is the new black! #slytherinpride

@thatshowjbrolls "not everything we do is about Justin Bieber." I hope you have a great night!

#reasonstobeatyourgirlfriend - Because you have nothing better to do with your life than harm the person you're supposed to protect.

"We don't make mistakes. We have happy accidents." - Joy of Painting

RT @theuserpool: I don't know why "Cunt" has such a bad connotation. It should be endearing. Take it back. Start calling your woman a cunt.

Honesty hides within the devil. #INSPIRO

RT @yourfavecrystal: Apparently it's Titty Tuesday ( . Y . )

RT @neatorama: The Heart Attack Grill : restaurant in Chandler, Arizona will serve free food to anyone over 350 pounds: http://bit.ly/abSk3p

Hilarious! RT @missrftc: RT @har0ld: "That shit is going to look so seasonal." http://bit.ly/al3IiE (via @ibogost)

RT @howtogeek: HTG Explains: Why Do So Many Geeks Hate Internet Explorer? http://goo.gl/n58z

Just passed an SUV with "I'm 18" painted on the window..... I think she wants me to fuck her.

@bo_dacious Oh hell nah! Foreskin is better for sex & handjobs. The extra skin acts like a ribbed condom, more ridges to feel! #Enjoy #Uncut

Holy shit... I'm going to die!!! http://www.thinkgeek.com/electronics/home-entertainment/cf9b/

"life is like this dark tunnel. U can't always see the light @ the end of the tunnel but if U just keep moving U will come 2 a better place"

@skippydubizzle Really though go check it out, its really unique and really awesome! (@writeonglass)

Hey! Do any of you belong to the social media site @writeonglass!? If so, let me know, if not, let me know if you want an invite!!

RT @bt: It is only when the sky is dark enough, you can see the stars. Bless you all and goodnight :)

★

My first thought upon waking up; "Sometimes I think my alarm clock goes off with intent to kill."