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The Patricia Arquette vs James Gandolfini scene in True Romance will always be one of my favorites. RIP Big Man
I hit a little girl on a tricycle, and when I got out to exchange insurance info she just laid there. It's like, come on... don't be a dick.
I wish I was a little bit shorter I wish I was a hoarder I wish there was a bed made of cats I could order.
*adopts a unruly dog*
im goimg to name u "drum" hehe
*gathers friemds*
look at this trick i taugt him
*dog does nothimg*
drum roll please
You have no idea how quickly I jumped off the couch to take this picture. pic.twitter.com/ocbTxBdt7Q
The Mexican space program is just a dark room with glow in the dark stars on the ceiling
Every time is 2 words asshole. RT @bigscott46: @jaysuch - everytime I read one of your posts, I realize that IQ has nothing to do with funny
I don’t understand why people take Twitter so seriously. I don’t even care about my job. And they pay me.
When I was 11 I inadvertently hit a friend in the head with a bowling ball at church he went to the hospital I finished the game we never spoke again.