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  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    “Lol, are you seeing this?” - fish watching us swim

    • 285
    • FAVS
    MacKooliothelittlephraseLittleJimmy61BlackCheesePielife_goes_on76CackleClubfarmarmsMuSuBi19
    • 107
    • RETWEETS
    SadieMegertS8804life_goes_on76farmarmslicquourRaoul_Duke_71thejoegofficialJake_Sniff
    Raoul_Duke_71
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    “Um.” - 1st horse that got ridden

    • 10k
    • FAVS
    ashtynleepmbak_28beachedwhale5bannister_lauradaryldaleylakenmarieeeBeeeiitcchhflalawallama
    • 7,579
    • RETWEETS
    itsoverthere89Rachel_muehmelBeeeiitcchhPhantomphoeniixthebadnotesov29enGrand_Mastajoamrco
    SteveSuckingtonPlaying_DadLisaGoodwin1letsgetgizzyduplicitronpattymoglenna_optSamGrittnerRitleySammichPeachCoffinmerican_ninjylawblobBDGarpGeoroyoAredubbleyou______mikescollinsjwoodhamzoeklarMissBamanthaamissmayn
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    If that kid in The Shining had been more of a player, he'd have tried to see if those twins would kiss.

    • 398
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    MacKooliohopewellcody_TommyJusticeJust_JakeingmarissasucksDouche_KevDBwiddaDBNotJamesRuntas
    • 140
    • RETWEETS
    MacKoolioSamaad_AhmedRealAudfutureTazZolmanGreeneyedMofo__phoquetopusNealandersonfanCodyStormPanic
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  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    *double jumps you on the trampoline* anyway ill just ask if you can stay over tonight

    • 114
    • FAVS
    blissfulhillaaarubsundressed__zoeklarspace__elevatorjacob_fistElektraLuxxxemilyybranch
    • 17
    • RETWEETS
    JonnyBadasssmuffinlabInternetuser92glitteringvoidDannybelliveauChuglowtake1xtie1xdayfogbitxch
    ElektraLuxxx
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    "Um, can we get like three baguettes popping out of the top of that sack of groceries?" - Most all film directors

    • 604
    • FAVS
    daryldaleyMacKooliothelittlephraseplantandmineralRaoul_Duke_71TitaniumToplassamelialikesyoujane_bot
    • 254
    • RETWEETS
    shannonmastelJ_OHHHHHmetalforfishshaeshaedaltonl1ll1lllBowbrownLetdownLizziejaxlrose
    BrandogramsSCbchbumSeanBlazed__
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    “Here, you can just have some of mine.” - me as one of those kids in the Trix commercials

    • 164
    • FAVS
    thelittlephraseLowkeyTwitsflashemberbotandynotjeffryanKingWereBearSwartzTherapist_MaridithJoy
    • 50
    • RETWEETS
    _MaridithJoymargosamplearandomhimDBwiddaDBByWayOfAlaskajewfacekillaBrief_Kasebarnonahill
    PeachCoffinglenna_opt
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    Do you wanna be player 1 or player 2 in this relationship?

    • 209
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    marvelousCarathatAndrewCPoguePhilosophyplfrederickMuhammedHariricesarAalvarezcatAshtrophe_NaughtIllUs
    • 52
    • RETWEETS
    trilllmommeganhalandRazzleNblu_twilighteyes08BookishBunnyDarthNisaabizarrequotesKostimografTW__
    vladchoc
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    Opened these packages of fruit snacks very quietly so maybe a part of myself wouldn't hear.

    • 121
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    clarissa_daviesTylerylimeslygotejongalaASpikerklttenzGoodOpinionManmichaeljhudson
    • 23
    • RETWEETS
    MrJamesCharismaellerollandslygotefavstar1000favsjohntoconnorHashtagJoanyJeepGypsyishluvmyptcruiser
    r_wolfcastle
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    Tired of washing my whole body every day.

    • 75
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    Bounse44suzy_saintShelbyyKateJennyPentlandHiK_Byeeverylilthingcaseyhatesboyshell_doe
    • 8
    • RETWEETS
    69shadesoftaarApocalypseBnGlivevarSunnyyySinghFavstar500FavsBirdmanAttorneyjessicarisdonAvatar_unknown_48
    jrflockton
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    Your neck tattoo says "Only God can judge me," yet here I am.

    • 2,315
    • FAVS
    daryldaleyBeeeiitcchhkkatelynalyssaDMAMA232323itsme_ctinaXHellOnHeelsXKenHuxley1Multitudes8
    • 1,857
    • RETWEETS
    Burds_1MacKoolioXHellOnHeelsXKenHuxley1monica_againSoGoFuGelasticGoGofucksundays
    louise_vuittonmikescollinsBeeStaplerRitleySammichMiahSaintletsgetgizzykokupuffSarcasmo718Kim_pulsiveAhm76jayna_patrice
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    “One adult for the Hobbit” is now the saddest thing I’ve said two years running.

    • 479
    • FAVS
    MobyTitsbigpapa_1969Eversmanbearpigdad_of_fatheadmck1484allthatisbeccasassybritches5BillJitsu
    • 214
    • RETWEETS
    allthatisbeccaBillJitsumr_dr_prof_erinDarthXavierblind_phineasLackOfShameRaoul_Duke_71Jonny_Dodds
    SCbchbum
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    "Have you tried sleeping? Okay. And you've had enough burritos lately? Hmm. Well, this is puzzling." - me as a doctor

    • 452
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    thelittlephraseRaoul_Duke_71septembawestWhoopdeedoo22dannykookooBrandogramsgayyybeconnor_weight
    • 174
    • RETWEETS
    favstar_historylaineybearswagsylvsylvJacinthiaJonesJRLynch1313SadPerunaadamcohen15Awk0Tacoo
    spitfirehussy__naazihahGageBoston
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    “Nice try, you fucking slut,” is a phrase I wish more people would shout at me for no reason, not just that homeless lady from a second ago.

    • 79
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    thelittlephraseNickBossRosscharlzeroTHEPokerWifeJennifergr8dsmitty_62ShaunaContr0l____gregelroo
    • 14
    • RETWEETS
    dsmitty_62arkenstoner_MobyDixonbrandibraandiFavstar_NSFWtimeforgoericgunder22kuuuurrrnn______
    dsmitty_62
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    I’m going to be fucked if the police ever need me to give them someone that can confirm my whereabouts like anytime ever.

    • 64
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    thelittlephraseNickBossRoss712_ScarWinterfistamandaraj5698felicitydelmarayyhluscucaseyhatesboys
    • 19
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    69shadesoftaarsirpeezy_JossBossashleeerikareedfelicitydelmarrlg_11oMissCarrieBabyoverEZmariezee
    ayyhluscu
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    “And what’s this?” “It’s a Papa John’s mega pizza cookie.” - me showing an alien some of our stuff

    • 164
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    septembawestNickBossRosspicklemintpartybluntslutxxmark_oh_snapHotSnuff__________julocalypseAlexaSaunders
    • 50
    • RETWEETS
    carlitaclbTheKritenjulocalypsemeghanlomaniaccjillianmccammonNSlandermanScienceJesusemmavictoria92x
    letsgetgizzy
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    I would’ve been embarrassed if I’d been that lady in the Psycho because I probably would’ve been lying down in the shower when he burst in.

    • 81
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    skinnymarieNickBossRossdnmac27Jeff29680bmarked21ShaunaContr0l____GrayShaynaoverEZmariezee
    • 16
    • RETWEETS
    dnmac27ShaunaContr0l____SocialMediaLia____MagYamartinoMissHeather95ASpikerFavstar500FavsADraganis
    WookieOnUnicorn
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    I respect how the Hamburglar was like, "Hey, I know I'm at rock bottom here, but I'm going to be professional about it and wear a tie."

    • 2,083
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    BeeeiitcchhapopagasmWhoopdeedoo22MacKooliothelittlephraseJaded_TomLaura_x0TMWrench
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    alcaponerawlinsJenX73stellamydogMetricButtloaddtipsonbravenewgrrrlFrigginboomrim_bod
    ARobustLoofahHome_HalfwayVikeeysSecretzoeklarlanyardiganDeanB15primawesomeKim_pulsiveKendragardenrobfeeChelsea_Elle
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    Tom Cruise is one of those guys who makes you watch him play single player video games.

    • 946
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    BeeeiitcchhBurds_1thelittlephraseRaoul_Duke_71Playing_DadTitaniumToplassjane_botREALityDUMB
    • 475
    • RETWEETS
    Beeeiitcchhjshadeduboisdjshankyswagereinahr_wolfcastleInitials_numberJMidwestdisfiguredself
    SamGrittnergreenteam15pjlynchMiahSaintMaruBean____
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    Pregnant women are basically sexy landlords.

    • 78
    • FAVS
    thelittlephraseNickBossRossShaunaContr0l____PatrickTodd84TorpidPulsareriknaydiukricprickCeej416
    • 19
    • RETWEETS
    madelieportman__SchoolerLAstarZshipTyKeelingnuramieraaaaleeyayasminlucwhite1KizerBillhelm
    stevesimas
  • rorynotroy
      rory @rorynotroy

    Spent all last night mouthing words to my dog to try and convince him that he'd gone deaf.

    • 427
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    thelittlephrasesingingdoves13HeyRache__gaggedwithspoonRaoul_Duke_71abbi_with_an_iapopagasmlandrews7
    • 178
    • RETWEETS
    favstar_historygaggedwithspoonRaoul_Duke_71robocopsmomdjshankyswagnickmullenspitfirehussy__whitefireofhell
    ARobustLoofahRitleySammichpantsIagreewithjoekatiefzack
@rorynotroy

@rorynotroy

not avoiding people just denying them my essence

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