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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one - and let the other off
I hate it when you're hanging out with MC Hammer and he won't let you touch anything.
Genius: "If I was an identical twin, i'd get a tattoo... Then send my brother back two days later for a refund."
"I've just called the tinnitus helpline. It just kept ringing." #LOL
March 4th... Always loved this date as it sounds more like an instruction than a date
You've got to love Victoria Station... https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10151520707403824 … #DropItLikeItsHot #OneLove (via @tube_boob)
Float like a butterfly, sting like a clock - Mohammed Dali...
"When someone yells stop, I don't know if it's in the name of love, it's hammer time, or if I should collaborate and listen." #classic
What a quote: "I didn't know how to approach you, so I drank some whisky. In case you don't know how to respond - here's a bottle for you."
"I'm currently writing a traditional Sunday roast cookbook: '50 shades of gravy'. Gets quite saucy in places."
Alphabet abusing verbal musings from one half of A.D.D (@blissstyles). Swear words, questionable opinions, drunken ramblings and house beats can be found here.