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  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    "Do what you love." ~Rich people

    • 4,034
    • FAVS
    notoriousPOBturefrure2happyrightNeonKrisamorrisdewgoldengateblondKenHuxley1Distracted2013
    • 2,952
    • RETWEETS
    Comatose_BatmorrisdewKenHuxley1jessiegoldmoonRogelioRangelliannabirdsinglegirlzrockjuneohara65
    JosesLovesYoubigmacherDanielRCarrilloWildeThingycathryn_wardmattZillaaaa
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    Every Scooby Doo episode would literally be 2 minutes long if the gang went to the mask store 1st & asked a few questions.

    • 3,848
    • FAVS
    kelter1twocatstwoTimMadsenjohngood2000AlexaMXCcouplethingspodamberrshellyykathyf1024
    • 2,392
    • RETWEETS
    KerfuckusTimMadsendarshnuggetjohngood2000_Timi_Hendrix_SeidelCarlJamieHumbleRollmaninoz
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    New guy at Starbuck's dotted the "i" in Erica w/a ♥ on my cup. Marriage proposal, right? Or he's gay. Or a playa. Dickbag. Hate him already.

    • 3,192
    • FAVS
    _troyjohnsongoldengateblondFunnyglirlL_dseyinspacei_eat_fruiturekasgoldNEthingButWorktreydayway
    • 1,263
    • RETWEETS
    FunnyglirltreydaywayPhildoBangnzCurly_gurl135GapToothWonderdangerboy74Twisted_Mettlebrandiwastaken
    treydaywayDumbConfessionsericonederfulWhatevaConcBlondiethegoodWookieOnUnicornBillMc7DaveWeasellvvzzsee_more13greenteam15TheDairylandDonJaySuchshruglordBarebakAssassinprimawesomeBlazedDonuts______dannydogmouthDeanB15TheTennisPhenomSaraESpiveytreydayway__abstractethedailymarkersameblackshoes1__StellacopterRyenInTheMoinesFadeAway2JazzzzzminaCpez38
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    Most adult friendships are just figuring out whose turn it is to cancel plans.

    • 2,409
    • FAVS
    oldsoulVHiPainTolerancehoekstra_mikeDonAndruttoFridaysKeeper_Dead_Guyseeking_Taylor_maisie7
    • 1,475
    • RETWEETS
    hoekstra_mikeseeking_TaylorSehablaboomiss_foofooSugarwillaMarcswifey21lethabomaesela1lloydrang
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    My dog licked the crumbs out of my computer keyboard & earned an online college degree.

    • 2,526
    • FAVS
    richardpeachy_troyjohnsonFerrisindustryComatose_Batblackburdstruismrmekathybotteasdedeluca_denise
    • 1,356
    • RETWEETS
    Comatose_BatKThonvoldboonecomedyjuneohara65jumpdasharkChloCumberbatchK_WCoxLordOfMacaroni
    lakeanagirlroggyiegigglegirlnoelAngreaHairyJew4LifeARobustLoofahlvvzzFSUSteve__1BigMickJaySuchGroperClevelandFredPollackpantsheymonroeHrBryDavidOzmundmattelgatoJason_maybethe_littletrampStellacopter
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    The number of hashtags you use on Instagram pix is equal to the number of psych meds you should be on.

    • 2,248
    • FAVS
    _troyjohnsongoldengateblond89mellottLa_Rouge_22booyahchadlyjumpdasharkchickenNiinjahereholddeez
    • 1,435
    • RETWEETS
    jumpdasharkmax_pad21i_eat_fruitML_OliverNeuronicismwavyG21treydaywayskinfullywicked
    BlackCheesePie
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    It's called St. Valentine's Day because St. Blowjob for Jewelry Day just didn't have the same ring to it.

    • 1,759
    • FAVS
    Twisted_MettleDumbConfessionsSmartticismsjaniceMcbMeghanOBTheSuperParentsTOPLAWDOGshopkins776
    • 1,279
    • RETWEETS
    TOPLAWDOGshopkins776ella_nycMummifiedvadersaladdixonshumanPuchynatornsideandysbrain
    LifesGoodThingnowarrantylovablelucaskingofalltweetsgoonumbertwo______BlazedDonuts______CrystalMoonableJayDirt___________
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    Thanks for sharing your moon with me on Instagram. We don't have a moon where I live.

    • 1,713
    • FAVS
    F_Tenchi_troyjohnsonjumpdasharkchickenNiinjamax_pad21Michael_Erhartfrk_mariatweetcomedian
    • 756
    • RETWEETS
    _troyjohnsonchickenNiinjamax_pad21Yo_Simmity_SamTatianaberquistelizabetheab8chasenicholas2KatieExpat
    Sarcasticsapien
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    If I don't return 17 calls,9 texts,& 7 emails, it's safe to assume you've been blown off & bumped up to Borderline Stalker Status. Sorry Mom

    • 1,789
    • FAVS
    L_RoidsmlgsSaveItForFestTwisted_Mettlekyle_thatisallDumbConfessionsSmartticismscloudypianos
    • 581
    • RETWEETS
    Dat_JewSaveItForFestTwisted_Mettleelectrobeatjunksim1spinGratefulWieuterdanger_spouseKarimJandale
    NinjaFuneral______ThateverydayguyHome_HalfwaySeanInCypressthetobbieezeddalyletsdancebitchsMaui_SpeaksdannydogmouthLicoriceNipples______Coastiefish
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    My gal pal: "Are you on a diet? You look so nice & thin... What's you're secret?!"

    Me: "Poverty."

    • 1,574
    • FAVS
    Michael_ErhartBillyX101Salmal44Curly_gurl135MindBytesTwisted_MettleDumbConfessionsSmartticisms
    • 667
    • RETWEETS
    BillyX101Curly_gurl135shopkins776KhaleddAhmedSmartassChefJSLauderdaleaarohi_25FaranasDhauri
    jlane_Mr_0rang3crayan9SergioValenCoMaui_Speaksshatty48
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    “I’m working on it.” = Haven’t done shit

    • 1,425
    • FAVS
    jumpdasharkHlaoRootweetcomedianTheRealLivedsunflowerdeedslauraleeksmithCubanB1987Livewire3791
    • 736
    • RETWEETS
    Okr8rHlaoRoosunflowerdeedslauraleeksmithLivewire3791minnie_in_pink7FrasierSeinBillyX101
    GreeneyedMofoezeddalyJoeyPositivityjedfudallylife_suckerMaryKoCoheykarlinedheenan__________slyoung5FSUSteve__
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    If you get pulled over in a Smart Car for speeding, you should get a standing ovation, not a ticket.

    • 1,386
    • FAVS
    wearesinessMichael_ErhartPartynaked22tweetcomedianerika1110cdaniel_frijolesDouchenaziCurly_gurl135
    • 522
    • RETWEETS
    PatriciaPotykaabduButterika1110cSalmal44Curly_gurl135swingkittenbearsnflamesDumbConfessions
    life_suckerUluwatuSiapziploccondom______AgamemNOMNOM
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    I’ve discovered, the easiest way to change a flat tire is by not wearing a bra.

    • 1,384
    • FAVS
    jumpdasharkbzswirl1ArtemisNYChatablockazSea_monkeeeyandersx3KillyaJeanSmithAliceWerner
    • 513
    • RETWEETS
    bzswirl1stoyan_petrovkayy_emmmxoKillyaJeanSmithLS0f4da12Sarrah_Sloanthegatekeeper50allijohnston
    QwertyJones3PeachCoffinanother_lisaTheAlexNevilkamiekaymee__zoeklarJandalize
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    I swear to god if this girl doesn't get my coffee order right I'm gonna tip her, drink it anyway & be back again tomorrow.

    • 1,327
    • FAVS
    chuckhayden73goldengateblondjumpdasharkPleasantSurprizSamanthaHorcruxmax_pad21L_dseyinspaceMindBytes
    • 494
    • RETWEETS
    max_pad21donna_fryseanjwebweezafishdangerboy74Twisted_MettleCurly_gurl135tangledwebber
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    The awkward moment when you say, "I love you," then the pizza delivery guy says, "That'll be $12.46, please."

    • 1,303
    • FAVS
    Michael_ErhartTwisted_MettleDumbConfessionsonume_KhaleddAhmedorlandoM321SmartassChefJSLauderdale
    • 319
    • RETWEETS
    KhaleddAhmedJohnnyGar11Lexi_GjSmartassChefloribuckmajormax_pad21clumsy_singhSir_Strange__
    gigglegirlnoelshegotagronkgingerfaced5haelPawnYourLifenotfaizzyMothpete
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    My son’s field trip consent form lists walkmans & radios under ‘Optional items.’ Where the fuck are they going, 1989??

    • 1,069
    • FAVS
    notoriousPOBjumpdasharkthegatekeeper50MillaVBillyX101secretlydeviant__iluvnyflashskinfullywicked
    • 537
    • RETWEETS
    betowmxCurly_gurl135nocombnobrushSaveItForFestJayPea222Twisted_MettleGriffinShamaraxileyx
    bornmiserable__lawblobTwiceTheHops
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    I'm like the David Hasselhoff of Twitter. I'm not particularly funny or talented, but they fucking love me in Europe.

    • 1,312
    • FAVS
    thats_sidLilMamacitaDontellenjohnson4Mr_Coffee28fgboofktemp__xothechevymanbruhCrazzzyKen
    • 247
    • RETWEETS
    thats_sidLilMamacitaDontktemp__xoCrazzzyKenDicker410love_my_2catsabhorrent_wifeCurly_gurl135
    Stellacopterthe_couch_guy____jrogasm__________JonCantTweet__Carmel_ColemanCoastiefish
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    Angry people who can’t take a joke have no idea how hilarious they are to those of us who can.

    • 1,062
    • FAVS
    BillyX101DouchenaziCurly_gurl135JayPea222Twisted_MettleDumbConfessionsHollyMemphisOhKateDarling
    • 480
    • RETWEETS
    Curly_gurl135Twisted_MettleMackTheMacHollyMemphisFartLunaticMJB2364CockydudeprobsDebraMuffin
    ArroiaVividJamerScigglez__________MrStaggsMiahSaintBaconHuffer
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    Guys, when us girls travel in packs to the ladies' room, we are ripping our clothes off, rubbing our bodies together & making out. Busted.

    • 1,155
    • FAVS
    Curly_gurl135Twisted_MettleDumbConfessionsMJB2364moon_pizza_mikeThat_Fing_CatfecicleDebraMuffin
    • 362
    • RETWEETS
    Curly_gurl135fecicleMJB2364DebraMuffinKhaleddAhmedCITYLONDONMEDIA__BINGBINGDELIGHTThrill_Tweeter
    Jenny4ashleyMasterOfFuryNikiWithIssuesFadeAway2
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    Supercuts is one step away from handing you the scissors & saying, “Here, you fix it.”

    • 1,131
    • FAVS
    jumpdasharkthegatekeeper50Twisted_Mettlekyle_thatisallNatalie_malDumbConfessionsericonederfulMr_Kapowski
    • 380
    • RETWEETS
    AllyMayhew123officeballerinaBareChestyorneryalwayssiddo471shopkins776perchicoreeiowaambchaser
    FatuousFloozy__
@SCbchbum

@SCbchbum

Got 86'd from Whole Foods for showering

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