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  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    New guy at Starbuck's dotted the "i" in Erica w/a ♥ on my cup. Marriage proposal, right? Or he's gay. Or a playa. Dickbag. Hate him already.

    • 3,069
    • FAVS
    smintcoraschweierrSir_StrangeTOPLAWDOGCosmoSwingLLCtiaaabiaAnchorsAviatorsdell0717
    • 1,206
    • RETWEETS
    Sir_StrangeCosmoSwingLLCAnchorsAviatorshirojesusIrishVinjumabrGSHOK9GanderGin
    WhatevaConcBlondiethegoodWookieOnUnicornBillMc7DaveWeasellvvzzsee_more13greenteam15TheDairylandDonJaySuchshruglordBarebakAssassinprimawesomeBlazedDonuts______dannydogmouthDeanB15TheTennisPhenomSaraESpiveytreydayway__abstractethedailymarkersameblackshoes1__StellacopterRyenInTheMoinesFadeAway2JazzzzzminaCpez38
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    "Do what you love." ~Rich people

    • 2,264
    • FAVS
    erikjpearsonClemsonSimpsonKatrinaMacADLWildBilboExitThaWarriorevidentlyblondeswimcharlieswimassfro
    • 1,816
    • RETWEETS
    ClemsonSimpsonbtosh71ExitThaWarriorswimcharlieswimmax_pad21wrstew5150taylor_lynn_wStcyBnsn
    bigmacherDanielRCarrilloWildeThingycathryn_wardmattZillaaaa
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    My dog licked the crumbs out of my computer keyboard & earned an online college degree.

    • 2,429
    • FAVS
    smintJgJacquelineSir_Strangedrewbie09The_Last_NomadhaykshanAspersioncasttgonefishin
    • 1,310
    • RETWEETS
    Sir_Strangedrewbie09hirojesuskspinks4485haykshantgonefishinLaurieDuvall3JIMBOSWELT
    roggyiegigglegirlnoelAngreaHairyJew4LifeARobustLoofahlvvzzFSUSteve1BigMickJaySuchGroperClevelandFredPollackpantsheymonroeHrBryDavidOzmundmattelgatoJason_maybethe_littletrampStellacopter
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    It's called St. Valentine's Day because St. Blowjob for Jewelry Day just didn't have the same ring to it.

    • 1,680
    • FAVS
    eborg01RichHarris2Sir_Strangetiaaabiadrewbie09hirojesushaykshananthony_rudd
    • 1,237
    • RETWEETS
    Sir_Strangehirojesuschriscoombs668KaylaKFosterSquizbotspiraled_awaypseudo_fredbaliska2
    LifesGoodThingnowarrantylovablelucaskingofalltweetsgoonumbertwo______BlazedDonuts______CrystalMoonableJayDirt___________
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    The number of hashtags you use on Instagram pix is equal to the number of psych meds you should be on.

    • 1,712
    • FAVS
    smintmattfabian25Jscarroll92tiffany_hobbsjoliu1035_jmcuellarCEA95_notyourmom_
    • 1,179
    • RETWEETS
    courtistachissMisslucyLeeRichHarris2Sir_StrangeMariaSchoenherrhirojesusHPEmilyGTabbyC5
    BlackCheesePie
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    If I don't return 17 calls,9 texts,& 7 emails, it's safe to assume you've been blown off & bumped up to Borderline Stalker Status. Sorry Mom

    • 1,758
    • FAVS
    Tink_tink25SJWritesHerexrandomxgirlxoff_beat_deadiiecpunktasteful_nudesholly_raganRichHarris2
    • 565
    • RETWEETS
    movinmeatheathercamfftasteful_nudesholly_raganRichHarris2Sir_StrangeDustyHumeAnchorsAviators
    NinjaFuneral______ThateverydayguyHome_HalfwaySeanInCypressthetobbieezeddalyletsdancebitchsMaui_SpeaksdannydogmouthLicoriceNipples______Coastiefish
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    My gal pal: "Are you on a diet? You look so nice & thin... What's you're secret?!"

    Me: "Poverty."

    • 1,554
    • FAVS
    RichHarris2FaranasDhauridrnkshakespeareSir_Strangejover_lointTOPLAWDOGCosmoSwingLLCjonporter27
    • 661
    • RETWEETS
    aarohi_25FaranasDhauriclumsy_singhSir_Strangejover_lointCosmoSwingLLCjonporter27AnchorsAviators
    jlane_Mr_0rang3crayan9SergioValenCoMaui_Speaksshatty48
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    “I’m working on it.” = Haven’t done shit

    • 1,355
    • FAVS
    RichHarris2FlowerChild037Sir_Strangejover_lointhirojesusBarctwainhaykshanAspersioncast
    • 697
    • RETWEETS
    FlowerChild037BoobsNBudsSir_Strangehirojesusdmcado81haykshanhymennnisdeadwhitney_beee
    GreeneyedMofoezeddalyJoeyPositivityjedfudallylife_suckerMaryKoCoheykarlinedheenan__________slyoung5FSUSteve
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    I’ve discovered, the easiest way to change a flat tire is by not wearing a bra.

    • 1,303
    • FAVS
    RichHarris2midweststoner1TayaJean_ESir_Strangejover_lointmoonbabi9hirojesusDAPettis
    • 478
    • RETWEETS
    BoobsNBudsFeelCosbySir_Strangehirojesusf1am3b0yhaykshanSquizbotlonewulf87
    QwertyJones3PeachCoffinanother_lisaTheAlexNevilkamiekaymee__madamezoobleJandalize
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    If you get pulled over in a Smart Car for speeding, you should get a standing ovation, not a ticket.

    • 1,260
    • FAVS
    smintRichHarris2hirojesusfreestyle56missbrownie1BarctwainhaykshanU_Looked
    • 465
    • RETWEETS
    hirojesusBarctwainhaykshanelyse4designsixfootcandyspiraled_awaySquizbotToxicWorrier
    life_suckerUluwatuSiapziploccondom______AgamemNOMNOM
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    The awkward moment when you say, "I love you," then the pizza delivery guy says, "That'll be $12.46, please."

    • 1,290
    • FAVS
    chkane23max_pad21AgirlProbsdildointheroughSir_StrangeBarctwainThe_Last_Nomadhaykshan
    • 314
    • RETWEETS
    max_pad21clumsy_singhSir_StrangehaykshanSquizbotELEPHANTSiNJARSOhYeahILiedpseudo_fred
    gigglegirlnoelshegotagronkgingerfaced5haelPawnYourLifenotfaizzyMothpete
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    I'm like the David Hasselhoff of Twitter. I'm not particularly funny or talented, but they fucking love me in Europe.

    • 1,278
    • FAVS
    max_pad21haykshansixfootcandyKaylaKFosterJSLauderdaleGeoff55RSquizbotAnemoneOh
    • 232
    • RETWEETS
    max_pad21Squizbotpseudo_freddavid_tullMeccaBrooksFortuitousPenRick_IZlllvvvzzz
    Stellacopterthe_couch_guy____jrogasm__________JonCantTweet__Carmel_ColemanCoastiefish
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    Guys, when us girls travel in packs to the ladies' room, we are ripping our clothes off, rubbing our bodies together & making out. Busted.

    • 1,142
    • FAVS
    haykshanzami_singsonBwanaChrisgymgirlmelroczacgratefuldad420ericxdeltabcfucku
    • 354
    • RETWEETS
    bcfuckuPaigemursetsixfootcandytreydayway__JSLauderdaleSquizbotdarrrkstarrrRillyKewl
    Jenny4ashleyMasterOfFuryNikiWithIssuesFadeAway2
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    Growing up, we had twerking too, except it was called 'That girl isn’t right in the head.’

    • 763
    • FAVS
    jover_lointhaykshanValerijaLapuhsixfootcandychriscoombs668FilmatelistKaylaKFosterBruppFWTX
    • 731
    • RETWEETS
    KaylaKFosterKrazydiamond81JSLauderdalespiraled_awayUrSassy_GingerSquizbotchar_m26MikeSpitler
    Thrill_TweeterKendragardenDontFuckWithMom
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    Angry people who can’t take a joke have no idea how hilarious they are to those of us who can.

    • 1,031
    • FAVS
    smintThe_Last_NomadhaykshanLittering_And___iLadyBirdU_Lookeds34n77nw8pdx
    • 463
    • RETWEETS
    haykshanmjkinneyjr_iLadyBirdsixfootcandyJSLauderdaleUrSassy_GingerSquizbotPrfeclyiNsane
    ArroiaVividJamerScigglez__________MrStaggsMiahSaintBaconHuffer
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    My son’s field trip consent form lists walkmans & radios under ‘Optional items.’ Where the fuck are they going, 1989??

    • 977
    • FAVS
    sminthaykshananthony_ruddCaptainKanedaKaylaKFosterThrill_TweeterJollyTaxpayerChillytimbo
    • 485
    • RETWEETS
    KaylaKFosterJSLauderdalespiraled_awaySquizbotSiggyMDAnalogbearhabreddevilchassidy_boggs
    bornmiserablelawblobdirtyCDNbitch
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    Supercuts is one step away from handing you the scissors & saying, “Here, you fix it.”

    • 1,092
    • FAVS
    TOPLAWDOGTeknozephemkyjbrentwhitworthronty167bozyyyyywin1romo9947_farooq
    • 365
    • RETWEETS
    Kelleyds23R47RFloYEdmondsonKRCTrainingAmyJJOTeknozephemkyjtaletreader
    FatuousFloozy__
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    Thanks for sharing your moon with me on Instagram. We don't have a moon where I live.

    • 946
    • FAVS
    cafuentes8BradBroaddusAngreaKirstensDeskAuntiPaxHulaBabeeBronxCheer48MikeSchism
    • 445
    • RETWEETS
    sillybritchesMaui_Speaksb4sageBree_diddle_deMisscassibeeCattyKoalasavanahrawlsblinkers0
    Sarcasticsapien
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    I swear to god if this girl doesn't get my coffee order right I'm gonna tip her, drink it anyway & be back again tomorrow.

    • 988
    • FAVS
    cdbmsu2017jover_lointDaddyJewThe_Last_Nomadhaykshananthony_ruddnitinsharma4ucox_pete
    • 393
    • RETWEETS
    marissadubleyouAnnaYsingerhaykshancox_peteKaylaKFosterOutOnTheMoorsCassidyrobinetjjjeffs13
  • SCbchbum
      Erica @SCbchbum

    Nothing snaps a woman into full blown CSI mode faster than an unfamiliar ponytail holder in her car.

    • 1,018
    • FAVS
    haykshanKaylaKFosterThrill_TweeterTHEPokerWifeSquizbotAnemoneOhMoreWantsJustFollownRT
    • 326
    • RETWEETS
    Squizbotspiraled_awaypseudo_fredelisa212007david_tullDesignerCuntTateRyanntsm560
    bazlyonschopper4jkBDGarp
@SCbchbum

@SCbchbum

Got 86'd from Whole Foods for showering