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In your lifetime there will be a guy you're crazy about and a guy will be crazy about you. These will never be the same guy.
Treat a girl like shit and she'll come running. Treat a woman like shit and you'll never see her again.
"What are you typing? Let me guess. Oh wait, stop right there, I know what it is. It's not that? Okay wait.. I know it, I know it!" -Google.
Got kicked out of a hypermarket today. For yelling "Change your avatars!" at the eggs isle.
Teach a man to fish and he'll be like "Cool, thanks!" Teach a woman to fish and she'll be like "You're doing it wrong."
If a girl likes you she'll do one of the following. 1. Be really nice to you. 2. Won't talk to you at all. Hope this helps, guys!
As you get older you realise it's better to have very few friends who share the same principles as you, than to have many who don't.
Contrary to popular belief, girls don't want the bad guy. Girls want the nice guy who knows how to be a bad guy where it counts ;)
So what if he's gay, she's a lesbian, she's not a virgin, he is a virgin or they're bi. How does it affect YOUR life? Live & let live, cunts
"Ugh he's talking to me, why doesn't he get the hint, I don't like him. Wait.. He stopped talking, OMG I want him!" -Girls.
"I have sex, I smoke up, I drink, but god forbid I'd ever eat pork." -The Muslims I know...
Remember boys, if she says she's never done that. She has, more often than you, and in public places.
We all read the back of shampoo bottles whilst on the toilet. Don't lie.
Mum: Could her skirt be any shorter? Me: Don't worry, her skirt always touches the ground by the end of the night.
Men don't grow up. They still cry for the same thing since they were babies; boobs.
"He's mad at me? Think of everything he's done to piss me off in the past 5 years and throw it in his face." -Girls in relationships.
I don't mind people doing drugs. Except for heroin. No one should do heroin because I can't afford it.
