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Having a hard time forgiving someone? Think about Mario.. still inviting Bowser go-karting even tho he keeps kidnapping his girlfriend
A horny pirate's worst nightmare is a sunken chest with no booty!
#6wordstories Once upon a time, the end
How did NASA figure out how to communicate with the first astronauts on the moon yet my Wi-Fi in 2015 barely reaches my parking deck?
If you dress like a cute baby duck & follow behind a momma duck & her ducklings, you can travel safely through any streets anytime
Some people just need a high-five. In the face. With a chair.
I suddenly got hungry for so many tacos. I want to take a taco shower. I want to ride a taco rollercoaster. Tacos. The end
"How To Train Your Dragon" Review: 1/5 Stars. Did not explain where I can buy a pet dragon.
I grow a beard because it's like tequila, it'll make your clothes fall off.
Kids aren't allowed to watch pirate movies that are rated Arrrrrr
Woke up with a little bit of a runny nose today. Googled it & well it appears I will be dying soon :(
I want to invent the donut hole shooter cause that'd be fun for everyone! Shoot me in the mouth all day
TGIF, or in other words I'm done with pants until Monday morning
If u wanna hang out, tell me like a week ahead of time so I can plan reasons why I won't be able to go
I wish puberty took you to a customize your character screen. I'd be so much better looking
Professional Goof Ball player. I'm on IG @ scodal, SnapChat @ salladttocs - FB: https://t.co/iAqpGpVnfZ YouTube: https://t.co/hOMyp1fLVo Favstar: https://t.co/nWg2pH8hku
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