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Wow, football and #GoldenGlobes on the same day. That's a lot for me to not give a shit about.
Kristen Stewart cheated on Rob Pattinson with the director of Snow White?! That's like a holy trinity of people I don't give a shit about.
Romney was kind to you? That is nice. RT @anncoulter I highly approve of Romney's decision to be kind and gentle to the retard.
Please help me get 14 new followers by August 30. I need a miracle here, people.
Sure, he loves Cookies, but the reason they call him a Monster is because he raped and murdered 16 people at the Nabisco factory.
Kid Rock endorsed Mitt Romney today, but his 1993 song "Balls In Your Mouth" endorsed Rick Santorum.
The GOP just refused to applaud when Obama said there's nothing USA can't achieve. I don't have a joke for this, just an astonished look.
I need a woman who's a Coffee Bean in the streets and a Tea Leaf in the sheets. What?
Rick Perry says he'll always err on the side of life. Except in those 234 executions. But other than that, yeah, life. #tweetthepress
"It came true" --Anne Hathaway describing my nightmare about listening to another one of her speeches. #Oscars
You're right, Dad: your next email forward about Obama being a Muslim who hates America is going to be the one that finally turns me around.
John Edwards, arching eyebrow: "And who is this Miss Trial I keep hearing about?"
How could Garfield have been so right about Mondays, yet so wrong about movies?
"Hitler Youth" and "Teen Nick" are both trending right now. America is finally starting to connect the dots.
Writer, TV's Conan. Watcher, TV's Three's Company.
Stats can't be shown as @ScottChernoff has never signed in to Favstar.
