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My idea of drinking responsibly is using a fucking coaster.
You can't be fixed by the same person who broke you.
I want someone to love me for my mind, and fuck the living shit out of me. Is that too much to ask?
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot kill, the courage to blow up the things I can, and the wisdom to not get caught.
Today's life lesson: "I've learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing them off is a piece of cake."
Stalking is where two people go for a long romantic walk together, but only one knows about it.
Trying to please everyone is like masturbating and hoping someone else has a fucking orgasm.
Life has never given me lemons. It has given me anger issues, anxiety attacks & a serious dislike for stupid motherfuckers.
I don't make bad decisions. I am one.
I think I broke another psychiatrist.
I don't need to "manage" my anger. You just need to "manage" your fucking stupidity.
I would tell you to go fuck yourself but I'm pretty sure you'd be highly disappointed in your performance too.
I'm really not miserable. I'm all peace, love and go fuck yourself.
We can't change the shit that's been done to us, all we can do is survive it.
Therapy is nice....but screaming fuck you, you motherfucking asshole at the top of your lungs for 10 seconds is faster & cheaper.
Screw Resolutions. No one likes a cheap, sober bitch that can run a fucking marathon anyway.
I love the way your voice sounds when you shut the fuck up.
"how to handle stress like a dog: if you can't eat it or play with it,
Pee on it and walk away."
Just grabbed a water out of my refrigerator and I swear I heard one of my bottles of wine scream....."what the fuck?"
I highly advise you not to fuck with me...I have a black belt in sarcasm.
Ex-con, college graduate, fuck is my favorite word, but deep down I'm quite a lady. IG Same name - #KCCO
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