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*sexually gets out of bed at 2pm*
Reminder that you can discuss sexual things on twitter without being a thirsty, creepy ass fucker.
14 years ago, The Sickness dropped. Ooo wah ah ah ah
The day that artists & bands stop including kids singing as part of their songs is the day that the world becomes 100% better
Cum is a race. If you hate cum, you are a racist.
if the bae isn't texting me or tweeting, I just assume they're jerking off - Confucius
Philosophy can easily be broken down into three parts: “Does going fast really exist?” “Why go fast?” “How do we go fast?”
Bae: come over
Me: i cant
Bae: but i'm your wife, dr pepper
Me: ah, i see, i'm actually on the way now.
*joins twitter & immmediately pays for favstar pro & who unfollowed me gold* i am so fuckign ready for web contentment.
*stands outside your house at midnight playing kk slider songs thru a boombox*
You can survive 3 days w/o water. 3 weeks without food. 3 months without shelter. 3 years without love. But only 3 seconds without cum.
fuckin ouch spogetyi lookin slithering ass motherfucker
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