Under SOPA, you could get 5 years for uploading a Michael Jackson song. One year more than the doctor who killed him.

Me: 3ayza latte so3'yar. Waiter: 3ando kam sana? Me: el3'y el order.

واحد كلم ماما على الموبيل قالها عايز أضرب عشرة. ست الحاجة قالت له ال عنف عمره مكان الحال. هي إزاي هبلة كده؟

The reason why women will never be the ones proposing, is because as soon as they'll get on their knees, the man will start unzipping.

Cry me a ter3a

1) Go to google. 2) Type "do a barrel roll". 3)Enjoy.

It's not hard to admit your mistake, but it's hard to admit enak ebn wes5a.

Are we wasting time or is it wasting us?

Your dad is a motherfucker. Think about it.

Dear Egyptians who can't speak English, don't speak English.

Note to self: Never introduce friends to other friends.

I...CAN'T...STOP...BAHAHAHAHAH!!! http://t.co/GAkdokIV

Once a 3ars, always a 3ars.

Egyptian Lady manners/Logic: We dont laugh out loud 3ashan 3ayb bas beno3od fash5een reglena wy el shisha fy el nos 3ashan e7na open minded.

I know I'll end up in a shitty mood whenever I wake up happy.

Remember when girls used to have self respect?

Posting your tweets on facebook is like a guy having sex with his mistress at home, while his wife is still at home.

Egypt's main transportation should be going out to space and jumping like Felix to reach destination. Way easier than traffic.

There's a HUGE difference between being open minded and being a sharmota.

What makes weird people weird, is that they don't know that they're weird. So please, stop calling yourself weird cause you're not.