Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
Remember, this too shall pass...but only after causing you tremendous pain and suffering.
I liked pretending to be an adult when I was a kid a whole lot better than actually being an adult now.
So busy doing nothing, I don't have time to do anything.
I look at everyone with suspicion because if other people are anything like me, then they're always up to something.
Anything is possible if you have good sauce.
Have you hugged your pillow today?
Apparently, the quality of the office toilet paper isn't something worthy of being discussed during management meetings.
I can make you feel worse. Come closer.
What do you call the phenomenon where you work harder when your boss is on holiday?
Friday plan: give everyone enough work that they're too busy running around & leave you in peace to do nothing but anticipate the weekend
That one time I rolled my eyes at your bullshit and my contacts fell off. Now I don't listen to you. Prevention is better than blindness.
I get along with me just fine. Maybe you're the one who needs some attitude adjustment asshole.
Regret takes too much time.
Who are these people who are screwing up just so they can find the bottom of rocks and hit them? Which part of the rock is the bum anyway?
The voices in my had have all grown fat thanks to good food and very little exercise.
Urgently needed: A switch that'll turn your brain off for a lil while so you can enjoy some peace and quiet.
New ambition in life - get a full-time maid. For cooking & cleaning & living my life when I'm too bored to do it myself.
So.....does this thing still work?
People are stupid.