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The car in front of me has a paleo bumper sticker. Nope nope nope.
A guy driving a Saturn blasting "Danger Zone" just shot past me. Sir, you are not Sterling Archer. He would not drive that.
I just spent over a minute trying to grab a bug off my screen before I realized it was the cursor. Hi Ambien, guess I'll buckle up?
I can't keep my damn eyes open, my shoes are wet from walking in the rain and I don't wanna do anything today. Why did I want a job again?
Crying at my desk. Love is love and now it's equal. Today is beautiful.
There are several people in this world that should consider themselves damn lucky that I'm not a messy trifling bitch looking to spill tea.
Kitty poo is talking politics at lunch. Can't decide if that or taking about work is worse. Equal? Equal.
Well, just got a gross reply to my Hattiesburg tweet. Gotta love that block button. No engaging with trolls here. Nope nope nope.
I hope Twitter never makes a tweet analysis tool on keywords bc mine will all be food, 1D, and a fuckton of cursing.
Generally ridiculous, forever sarcastic and/or inappropriate, alleged adult. 1D af. No apologies for living my most authentic life.
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