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All I want for Christmas is a reanimated Steve Jobs
FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK
I want drugs and beer (in moderation) and art and fucked up music and walks downtown and seeing new places and real friends and free time.
My favorite type of moat is a remote.
Sweatshop work ethic: why the Subway in chinatown is always the best.
I vow to never compare genocide to my ability to drink a lot of cans/bottles of beers. Never, ever.
The best part of customer service is sending people away dissatisfied.
I just bought an electronic cigarette and rubiks cube dice for my rear view mirror. I am going to nerd hell
Natalie Portman had a baby. What a slut.
at work I decided to be the ghost of optometrists past for Halloween 2011
home is where you find and see truth to your life.
FINNISH HIM! What Mortal Kombat says is Finland.
Drank more beer than science recommends #Calgary
"why aren't you more like Jamie Oliver?" said my mom... "I don't have a speech impediment..." said me
Wrapping presents is like origami for white people #whitegirlproblems #whitepeople #crackers #christmasSPIRIT #HappyHolidays
Creating requires freedom
Dear Visa, sorry I can't pay you off... I thought I'd either be dead by now, famous, or dead and famous... #holidayhumor #Iraq #losangeles
Dear universe, please put David Bowie in a Batman movie while he is still alive.
Sometimes I just want to scream "get off my Facebook feed fucko!" Sometimes I just want ice-cream.
People can smell the stoner in me
Official Shawn Raw Power-er-er-er-erererererererer follow me, I shall show you the way