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I'm driving around eating steak in my car. Find someone else.
Just once would it be too much to ask to be on the naughty list?
Nothing good can come from answering FB Messenger.
I feel like you thought I was joking when I said I am needy.
The monkey bars are fuckin tough these days.
You smell like beef and cheese. And I like it.
Accidentally texted Happy Spanksgiving to my Grandma with a picture of me slapping my own ass.
I hope all you drunks enjoy your beverages.
Your driving is making me feel fat
I can only imagine you annoying @ repliers were the kids in high school who raised their hand just to reiterate what the teacher was saying.
"I don't get it"
Sighed so hard I thought my boobs were gonna reach up and punch my face.
*related, my boobs are not nearly as big as I'd imagined.
Clitoris is a stupid word for a spectacular thing.
I can prove I have a pink dragon that shits snicker’s bars in my closet but first you must believe me, THEN I’ll share my proof 😂
you might win some but you just lost one. @Blarebare gets my noogies.
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