Congratulations to former President George W. Bush who, despite goading from Rush, would not be negative about the current administration.

They're calling those those wacky misspelled signs of the Tea Party "Teabonics" -http://bit.ly/cQ7UNM

I think Captain Picard wanted to be a doctor. He asks his crew members repeatedly, "Urinalysis?" Even Data seems puzzled.

Am I the only one who sings opera when making cheese toast? Formaggio toast! Si prega di non lasciare me! Sei l'amore della mia vita!

My fiendish coworkers sign cards for others facing surgery with, "Can I have your desk?" "Where's that $5?" and "Don't go into the light!"

Be sure and tune into the networks tomorrow evening for the debut of the new reality show, "Here comes Romney boo boo!" Check local listings

You know why they finally had to kill Shatner off in "Star Trek" yes? At his age he'd be driving the Enterprise with the turn signal on...

Before you applaud the great performance of that mime on tbe corner, make sure it isn't just someone wearing a Bluetooth device.

No where in the Constitution is the Tea Party branch of Government mentioned.

I noticed a large dent in the side of a truck painted in camoflauge. Guess the other driver didn't see it.

The smugness of representatives who will never worry about where a meal comes from, after taking it from those who always worry, stinks.

I find it tragic that with a megadisaster in Japan - one that shifted the earth's axis 10" and Japan 8' - wars are still going on elsewhere.

Mickey Rooney discusses twitter with Ben Stiller. http://bit.ly/15dLx3

We Americans really are a bunch of spoiled impatient people aren't we.

We take so much for granted in this country. Here is a man's struggle and quest to get to Ebertfest by @waelkhairy88 http://bit.ly/7tNNmh

@onlineloser No sheet, Sherlock.

@giselenoel Just tell them, "Thanks, I'm listening to the audio version now and I don't want to have to start over at the beginning."

Give a man unemployment benefits and he'll survive briefly. Give a man a job and he'll get laid off and need unemployment benefits.

#BehindtheCandelabra Seeing himself on television, Liberace cries, "I look like my father in drag!"

@onlineloser That's not me, it's harass.