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Girlfriend : Babe , What´s Your Fav Position? ;) Boyfriend : When I Get On One Knee and Make You My Wife.
Boy: hey dad I got a girlfriend Dad: Good job son! Girl: Hey daddy I got a boyfriend Dad: *loads shotgun*
I don't have an attitude problem. I have an attitude that you have a problem with
Chris Brown hits her, Eminem lies to her, Drake can't remember her name = The life of Rihanna
Your ex asking to stay friends after you break up is like kidnappers asking to stay in touch after they let you go.
I don't have ex's, I have y's. Y the hell did I do that?
i text you a whole paragraph within 5 minutes and you text me back 40 minutes later saying "K" ... Are you asking to be punched?
Who woke me up ?
My answer: God
Who died for me ?
My answer: Jesus
RT if you love God, keep scrolling if you dont
When people yawn, do deaf people think thier screaming???
I hate it when teachers say, ”You think its funny?" Obviously. That’s why I laughed, bitch
That awkward moment when you realize you’re walking in the wrong direction, so you hit your pockets pretending you forgot something
Hey mom... mom, mom, mom, mommy, mom, mom, mom, mom! WHAT?! Whoa! Never mind then...
Welcome to the Karma Cafe. There are no menus, you will get served what you deserve
Seeing your ex with someone uglier than you is the best feeling in the world.
"Dear face wash commercials, People don't actually splash their face like that. Sincerely, my bathroom floor which is now soaking wet.
Talk shit , get hit , cause and effect , learn it bitch
You're 13, you smoke, drink, and have sex? I sense you have a bright future ahead of you.
I wish I had Dora's parents. They let that bitch go everywhere.
Father's Day, the most confusing day in the ghetto.
Not affiliated W Stewie Griffin #TeamSongz #TreysAngels @treysongz Followed 02/14/12 #ChapterV Now in stores Outchea..
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