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when I first learned how to read, I thought a carpet was a pet for your car. thank you for your time!
3 on 3 hockey is really cool.
Finally eating. Hope it stays down. I can only hope gravity is on my side.
I had a few drinks to mend the problem, but it hasn't worked.
I give my boyfriend head in exchange for chipotle and candy crush lives.
Mardi Gras ended Tuesday
Cinco de Mayo is too far away
Are you in a funk? Just wanna get drunk?
Well, hey, how bout St Patty's Day?
Would like so much to sit and do nothing for awhile. My own nothing.
The last time I checked, screamed, throwing things, and calling each other names was not how you resolve an issue.
Why am I forever being told that I'm weak, to grow a backbone, to stand up for myself.
Why is choosing to not take part in a screaming match, making someone else feel bad considered a sign of weakness?
They say, "The grass is always greener...." Well, I'm screwed.
I'm in a desert.
I framed your autopsy photos.
The camera really loves you, by the way.
wearing headphones and I have absolutely no idea how loud I just farted is this what old people feel like
I'm honestly at a loss for words here, maybe one of you can explain it to me.
Good news for us both. I’m about to start ignoring you
So Americans hate on the govt but they don't even have to vote. Well if you don't vote, your hating right are revoked!
The hardest part of pimping is processing the timesheets.
Children's books are easy. Here's a bear. Here's a cow. Here's a pig. Now draw them like a fucking idiot would
Hahaha...more like HA!ters.
Nobody is jealous of your dumb ass.
They're fucking laughing at you.
So am I.