@StillDrew's (Drew (Not a Guy) H) recent favourites. See who @StillDrew favs the most...
When asked “what is your greatest fear?” My response is simple. My greatest fear is that I'll not live long enough to finish what I starte
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StillDrewpenblethEggSoupMeesterNick
Odds are that no one remembered to drug these donuts but that's not gonna stop me from saying they were after I fall asleep in this meeting.
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TymethiefkyleveBlondHousewifeStillDrewbloberttopnotchtutor
If you added all the Joes in the world together and then divided by the total number of Joes, then you have me – just an Average Joe.
@MeetingBoy Resignation via text works too; only need 2 letters: FU. Smiley face optional.
@ocean1blue in reply to MeetingBoy
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MeetingBoyTymethiefStillDrewmana_bearpenblethtopnotchtutorJeanM617IamPinky
SERIOUS! 11,000 FOLLOWER! AND NO ONE OF YOU EXPLAIN DRUNK HULK THAT URINAL CAKE NO REAL CAKE!
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superduperjesJezebelTheGreatkattcallsGabryylStillDrewDesperate_Loserkay_dubbayoo
LISTEN PEOPLES! IF YOU QUOTE DAN BROWN IN DEBATE WITH DRUNK HULK! YOU LOSE AUTOMATIC! QUOTE JAMES BROWN! YOU MIGHT WIN!
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J_EthanhacopianhereonthelevelStillDrew
Some of my best friends have friends who are black.
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iamjustcaraJohnnyChimpoelibradenNerdy_NoraStillDrewVaginaDrumItsOkBlameMeSuperfluouslyJenn819darcikelleyBettyLiessourcowsQuinnKkellan_standley
One day the Supreme Court will overturn Alien v. Predator. One day.
I got 99 problems but an original joke isn't.. anywhere.. on the list..

*cough*

WHAT IS UP WITH THESE CHEATING HUSBANDS AMIRIGHT?!?
Six: MOM! SHE'S-

Eleven: Shhh! Don't be a narc!

David: Have I thanked you lately for teaching them to say "narc" instead of "tattle tale"?
You will pry my Oxford comma from my cold, dead, and lifeless hands.
I can't believe after a lifetime of searching, THIS has become my hobby.
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Spinchangelucyspetfactualfictionkambrockavi1111Miss_CookNikiWithIssuesjoesmithreallyRickster_01bitterpussjuicymorselHormonellastupenduitsdonnaokStillDrew99VIEW
ALL
Lady next door's dryer just caught on fire
This is why I don't do laundry
WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW NAYSAYERS OF HOUSEKEEPING ENDING IN TRAGEDY?
My inner child just told me she's adopted.
You’re a worthy nemesis, pollen. I declare cab fortress of solitude yet you ride a breeze in through open window. Well fucking played.
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NotHotdavio1962JezebelTheGreatwifeoftjapricoticatrixiebootsMidSeaMomStillDrewTrick_or_tweetblondediva11
Fess Parker died. It is a sad day for everyone but raccoons who didn't want to become hats.
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StillDrew
Daylight savings time: Good for farmers, bad for people who masturbate in their car while driving home from work.


Um...so I've heard.
My son didn't like tonight's kid’s menu. Told me there way no way he was going to eat the chicken’s tenders.
Cracker Barrel has to be the most appropriately named restaurant for it's target demographic.
Ignore it and it'll go away.
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