@Suck_A_Duck's (Christoffer B.M.K.) most faved Tweets...
The next person who hits me with a pillow on Facebook gets a hit put out on him in Mafia Wars and have the body buried in Farmville.
40% of the population is stupid and stuggles with math.
The other 70% of us don't have a problem with it.
The other 70% of us don't have a problem with it.
Who would’ve thought that I, the guy who drew a smiley face on his own testicle two weeks ago… Wait, I forgot where I was heading with this.
Please stop shouting “FIRST!” in comments! The only good time to yell this is right after you’ve banged a virgin.
Dear boss,
thank you for the job that gives me health insurance that covers my anxiety medication that I need to take for this job.
thank you for the job that gives me health insurance that covers my anxiety medication that I need to take for this job.
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. But when life gives you melons, you know you’re dyslexic.
I opened my mail and I thought I had a generous offer on my house.
But then I was shocked when I realized it was my new heating bill.
But then I was shocked when I realized it was my new heating bill.
To save some time, I’ve put toothpaste in my coffee. But I forgot that it also takes a lot of time to run to the bathroom and throw up.
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