Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
I want to bring back the Ace Ventura victory air hump. Pumped gas to a perfectly rounded $? Air Hump! Donuts in office kitchen? Air hump!
If you drive 10-and-2 you are either going way too slow or way too fast.
Nothing says "I ♥ pit bulls" like a chain link fence in a questionable neighborhood.
It's 2011 and I just had to lick an envelope..is this real? Can we at least make it taste like a margarita or something?
Need directions to a CVS? Go to the nearest Wallgreen's and look the opposite direction. Done.
Vagina + Acne = Vagacne (vajacknee) You can't argue with science.
Just before I ask my boss to take a vacation, I cover myself in eraser shavings so he thinks I've been busting my ass instead of tweeting.
It took me an embarrassingly long time to realize that Jesus was actually 'Hey-Zues'. So yeah, I'm white and went to a private school...