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  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    My 20 y.o. daughter is battling cancer and gets a bone marrow transplant today.....send some good twitter vibes our way please! :)

    • 93
    • FAVS
    HeyZeus666FRANKSTALICIOUSdomina_rubrumSableFlareRaging_ZombieCabbageNewspickled_idiotTwistacles
    • 107
    • RETWEETS
    ForSixbrad_fogartyTwistaclesjayfromthedayTexas702MissKristieedewwhat72nutmouse
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    After watching one lady drink her piss and another binging on cat treats on My Strange Addiction tonight, I feel normal as fuck.

    • 17
    • FAVS
    FRANKSTALICIOUSihatejaneshortKittySaysMeeowohwrigleyTortilla_NaziAdorkableMedicShaunRightNowmybigblondelife
    • 8
    • RETWEETS
    ohwrigleyTortilla_NaziAdorkableMedicnoirekaJustASmirkNova_SummerMizBlueBallsWorptWords
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    for some reason one of my 8th grade boys keeps yelling, "rubber penis" at random. Told him to stop w/ the wishful thinking and get to work.

    • 16
    • FAVS
    AdorkableMedicShaunRightNow1evilidiotPoppawStevejehujeniWond_R_PetzDumbassadorTorriable
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    So a guy on My Strange Addiction wants to fuck his car. His father asks him, "Is this because of the divorce?" I'm thinking it goes deeper.

    • 12
    • FAVS
    AdorkableMedicShaunRightNowDrangulaPoppawSteveJustASmirkjehujeniWond_R_Petzsplendidly_dull
    • 3
    • RETWEETS
    jbird8888WorptWordsRockStarPoet
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    What is a Twitter Elite? For example: What are the perks? Do all elites get a cake party in the break room at month's end? Any cash prizes?

    • 12
    • FAVS
    AdorkableMedicShaunRightNowTorriablePoppawSteveJustASmirkSarcasmicfiendMeanOldManMikeMajorDickDanger
    • 2
    • RETWEETS
    MeanOldManMikeAnyalachae7
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    What kind of weirdo has a birthday party for their cat? How ridiculous. I can't go anyway, my dog has its first Holy Communion that day.

    • 11
    • FAVS
    AdorkableMedicShaunRightNowTheLastVirgomybigblondelifeHeyZeus666INandONyourMINDMsFionaDScottLinnen
    • 2
    • RETWEETS
    AdorkableMedicJaccTrippa
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    Praying for my Facebook friend's dog....it is in Hospice. I depended on that dog for likes and comments. This sucks for me.

    • 10
    • FAVS
    ella__frasermegbadaKittySaysMeeowAdorkableMedicShaunRightNowRoses4EllieRockStarPoetYesitsAl
    • 2
    • RETWEETS
    AdorkableMedicRockStarPoet
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    I am happy to report that approximately 73% of my Facebook friends are feeling "blessed" this morning. Lucky fucks.

    • 10
    • FAVS
    sumpeoplelikeitAdorkableMedicShaunRightNowDrangulaPoppawStevePurpleSwtPotatobrokeninjaTGIJeff
    • 2
    • RETWEETS
    brandonduwejpluskay
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    I consider Twitter my beacon in dark times. So basically, I'm fucked.

    • 7
    • FAVS
    sumpeoplelikeitSydney_Lewis00RockStarPoetglenna_optTwistaclesRaging_Zombiealucardsdream
    • 4
    • RETWEETS
    RockStarPoetTwistaclesdorritobreathSir_MeowMixAlot
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    "There's some boom boom in this poon poon" - emblazoned across the tshirt of the man at the gas station who just asked for my phone number

    • 10
    • FAVS
    sumpeoplelikeitAdorkableMedicShaunRightNowPoppawStevejehujeniTetley6969UluwatuSiapMattDaddyO
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    WorptWords
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    I just saw a real live nun at the post office. I didn't know people still did that shit.

    • 9
    • FAVS
    AdorkableMedicShaunRightNowmybigblondelifeRockStarPoettwinanator5haelsqareballICanStillDream
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    TeriBussart
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    So my friend's dog has liked 3 of my status updates on Facebook today. A new low for me.

    • 8
    • FAVS
    AdorkableMedicShaunRightNowPoppawStevejehujeniWorptWordsRockStarPoetSquirrelNugsjbird8888
    • 2
    • RETWEETS
    WorptWordsRockStarPoet
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    Busted one of my 6th grade boys for sexual harassment and transmission of porn in 1st period today. Shouldn't be long before he's on Twitter

    • 6
    • FAVS
    MarianMme16513Prodigal_nundezo471BeerritoTheReal_AndyMacjasonlight73
    • 3
    • RETWEETS
    MarianMme16513Beerritojasonlight73
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    Big Vagina in Little China #ReplaceFilmTitlesWithVagina

    • 6
    • FAVS
    AdorkableMedicjehujeniDumbassadorUluwatuSiapRockStarPoetilluminatedwndr
    • 3
    • RETWEETS
    WorptWordsRockStarPoetLeaEllieAbiAkl
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    In class w/ my 6th graders, 2 smell like cat pee, another is tone deaf and playing Xmas songs on a flute,1 keeps farting...someone shoot me.

    • 5
    • FAVS
    MaxxamillianakarmuttWorptWordagegiantsshirtAdorkableMedic
    • 3
    • RETWEETS
    MaxxamillianakarmuttWorptWordage
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    You know things have taken an ugly turn when you find solace in the guitar solo of The Knack's, "My Sharona".

    • 8
    • FAVS
    AdorkableMedicTheLastVirgomybigblondelifeMoronyc3dimes4nickelsmonaliesasmileJustASmirkTwistacles
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    I suggested a game for Facebook and got shot down:( "Meth World"- you build stoves to cook, award meth recipes to friends, build rehabs, etc

    • 6
    • FAVS
    AdorkableMedicShaunRightNowmybigblondelifeRockStarPoetTwistaclesgottahavheart
    • 2
    • RETWEETS
    Twistaclesgottahavheart
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    Everyday I see dozens of friends who are "blessed" on Facebook. On here, not so much.........

    • 7
    • FAVS
    AdorkableMedicShaunRightNowkellysdfDan93Jameselvisknievil_LUMPP8NT4R
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    _LUMP
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    I picture the #teamfollowback people alone at the computer,holding pep rallies, awarding spirit sticks and cartwheeling w/ ea. new follow

    • 7
    • FAVS
    AdorkableMedicDrangulaHeyZeus666neutralmilk_EHRealPrincessKimMr_Clean69imabbylouise
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    StaaayScheeemin
  • Teepwin
      TW @Teepwin

    I didn't make it to church for Easter so like the Toddler and Tiara girls do, "I'm gonna jack my hair up to Jesus" instead.

    • 7
    • FAVS
    AdorkableMedicShaunRightNowWorptWordsjehujenijpluskayRockStarPoetSir_MeowMixAlot
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    RockStarPoet
@Teepwin

@Teepwin

like, whatever.