Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
I sat next to an 8 year old on my flight who told me she wanted to name her son "Garbage Socks Awesome-People" and we became best friends
Eating salad at 1am alone in a hotel is one of the pointless things. NO-ONE CAN SEE ME. WHAT'S THE POINT?
Sometimes I think I'm really smart, then I remember that there are people that can do things like add & subtract without a calculator.
One martini with 37 olives, please. No, nothing to eat, thanks, I'm not hungry.
If I were rich I'd spend at least a year of my life getting fired from minimum wage jobs for elaborate reasons
They should remake "What Women Want" with Mel Gibson now, so all he hears is "Oh my god, it's that racist asshole" and "Fuck you, sugartits"
A morning-after pill but for when you accidentally watch something with Robin Williams in it
Stand-up comedian . On the weekends I shit in grand pianos for charity. Instagram: filetking