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No I will not erase your small penis pic. I will show it to all my friends. They need a good laugh now and then too!
I'm smiling today. That, by itself, should be a hint for you to figure out what you may have done and commence running.
I bought a bag of Bugles tonight, they don't make them like they used to - they no longer fit on my fingers.
If everyone wasn't always out to get u, u'd probably feel less paranoid...
Told my boyfriend I planned on divorcing him someday.
I hate not knowing everything. 😠
So when I switch to Verizon I'm going to call AT&T & ask if they can hear me now When they say yes I'm gonna say good discontinue my service
Ever want to be invisible long enough to slap the shit out of the people in the other room and not get caught? Yeah, me too.
OMG CONSPIRACY THEORISTS UNITE! I HAVE INFORMATION THAT THE WORLD IS GOING TO (or just might) END (someday)!
This being a responsible adult shit is for a responsible adult 😒 I shouldn't have to do it.
I'm so flippin brilliant! Freaked out when I got a call this morning and didn't hear it ring. I've had my phone on silent since I got it.
STFU you twatwaffle
I am in LOVE!
C'mon Animal lovers start harassing me about wanting snakeskin boots. I dare you to. Btw I might eat the snakes too. Omg! I'm such a sinner!
My plans for tonight. Go outside with a gun and try to find more snakes to shoot. I really want snakeskin boots from snakes that I kill.
Got my foot stepped on by a very smart horse. I said ow my foot and the horse lifted his foot so I could get mine out from under his. 🐎🐴
Because my ringtone and alarm are so similar, I've literally answered my alarm.
Nothing like being told "you're lazy" by your significant other to help with being down.
I feel all wiggly
YES! LIGHTENING AND THUNDER! LOVE IT!