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@jessicacabot I'm my lover... It's not much better
@jessicacabot I'm a pot smoking cartoon lover. I'm not Jewish, but I am good with money and most people find me annoying
@thatjenngraves I don't want a girlfriend; I just want a maid that accepts sex as payment.
@kendragarden shopping for clothes on LSD. Get on my level
@tomhanksishot I assume he is bored because he has already invented worst pizza people will still buy. #lifeSucksAfterYouAccoplishYourDreams
@robdelaney should I hyphenate the word night-boners? I feel like you would know
@deadlegmeg I'd hit it
@jessicacabot depends what calendar you believe in. Mayan, Gregorian, pizza hut. The existential nature of the ? Leads 2 infinite answers
I ate a shitload of raisins after I smoked a joint just now. Apparently I don't think I spend enough of my life in the bathroom
@jessicacabot I'd ballpark it about 47 bucks a week. I know a lot about these things. I deliver pizzas #notTryinToBrag
@jessicacabot I could give you my social security number to make it easier
smarter, funnier, more respected, and better looking than you
Stats can't be shown as @TexasDavo has never signed in to Favstar.