Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
Google glasses are great because I've been wondering how going on a date with somebody glued to their iPhone could get any more annoying
God made "romance" and "take off your pants" rhyme for a reason.
I don't take coffee without milk and sugar because I'm "sweet enough". I take it because I have an enormous penis.
I was a feral, filthy child. Raised by eyebrows.
Coach rhinos, guys, don't poach rhinos. Believe in yourself, Rhino.
Church, are you mad at the hobosexuals too?
Lookin' goooood, Spar ladies. #Movember
Spanspek does not mean Team Bacon.
Am watching The Beaver and am kind of confused about howcome Jodie Foster isn't the one with her hand up a beaver here
On a scale of Tegan to Sara how gay is today?
I really really appreciate how people at AfrikaBurns can't live-Tweet AfrikaBurns.
I spilled coffee on everything important. I know this makes me look very clumsy but actually, I'm just successfully marking my territory.
I'm so happy all these friendly-looking middle-aged men want to add me to their professional networks on LinkedIn!
Who invented the "effortless platonic neck kiss"? EXPLAIN yourself. And explain what you're supposed to do back? Re-position and kiss back?
How bullshit was The Avengers? Mark Ruffalo and Robert Downey Jnr don't kiss even ONCE.
My Tranny name is Wolfpack Fannypack.
90% of my internal monologue is really just Homer Simpson chanting "I am Evil Homer/ I am Evil Ho-MER!"