Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
Don't lie to me Sharon! I know you've done anal! I can smell it! *my wife is not impressed with my superhuman abilities*
Jesus tries to take the wheel, but you drive a manual so he has to climb onto your lap to shift.
Ass so fat fucking bounce and cause an earthquake. Nah seriously Chick. Stop. You're scaring the children.
Getting tired. Gonna look up boobs again
Life isn't always about twitter. I mean I'm right, right? There's like white women and stuff out there somewhere.
Ravioli Ravioli give me the dickioli
I'll have a scotch on the cocks. No wait!
*too late, there's already tiny dicks floating in the drink*
*male bartender winks*
*shuts off President simulator*
"Yeah man! This is the life" I say as I lean back in a chair made of dicks
5 teens doing ollies on skateboards. When they reach 666 a pentagram appears in between them and Satan, the god of shredding, kickflips in.
Give me just one minute. I'm talking to my mom*you hear through the phone* 'I said I only bathe in honey barbecue!! Dammit mom!! '
A kissing booth except it's just me sitting in a chair awkwardly making eye contact with the ladies
No bro! There's not a cuddle blankey in my closet! What are you doing?! No seriously just stay away from the closet bro. That's not mine!
Three kids sitting around an Xbox with NBA 2k13, chanting in Latin and making blood sacrifices to ensure their team wins the title.
Just do it! I'm not gonna make it!
Ok, Jesus! *gets on radio*
Frank, Zach wanted me to tell you 4:20 blaze it up faggot
if there's one thing I've learned in life, it's to stop crying you pussy, grow the fuck up, you're almost 20. Jesus!