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@juddapatow @realdonaldtrump the fact that you dangle millions as a rude ploy while tens of thousands starve is disgusting. #UnAmerican
@rationalists Thousands are now bedazzling their hoodies in the name of street saftey.
@rationalists Sad as fuck when a shooting in a town needs to be clarified by The New, Aurora shooting.#brokencountry
@elizabayne tried that, but my IPad didn't follow the trail at all.
@cjwerleman do it. We are booking tickets one we get back from our holiday trip. looks like July.
@cjwerleman "Did I invade Iraq under false pretenses?" "Sure, probably under one of my drunken stupors I did"*Lines GW wishes he thought of
@cjwerleman can't wait for Barney's Christmas campaign then: "At these low prices, you'll be a slave to *shopping!"*also to unlawful search
@cjwerleman @sarahpalinusa I just had a cronut that tasted like..... And this isn't racist.....a chinamen.
@elizabayne You just got a "rise" outta this machine! (I pointed to my wiener while saying that)
@cjwerleman its good to see that God finally made "Oprah's favorite things" list.
@kumailn I feel like this is your subtle take on the government shutdown, and it's brilliant.
@cjwerleman do trans have vaginas ?
@scullymike I almost tweeted 'Me Too!', but I thought you said re-wiping.
@elizabayne then crying in the tub repeating the lines at the end of that scene, 'big mistake, huge!'
@dan_is_boring @gspellchecker Friendly fire GS!! friendly fire!!
@rationalists Happy Australia Day! Finally reason for Aussies to get drunk and loud! Oye Oye Oye!!!
@nerdfaced I know right?! They waited sooo long !
@thegallantshow @delaynamichelle not in like a basement, like in a relationship....I made it weird.
@delaynamichelle Cheers ;)When he calls you late at night, full of regret, remember there are loads of dudes who'd keep ya.
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