I'm really not a whore. I am just an excellent flirtation device.

Ppl quit trying to become the next Tony Robbins by tweeting kind thoughts. We all know you're full of shit. Tweet about what matters:

I have standards. Well at one point I did then I lost them and never got them back.

If it wasn't for prescription drugs, alcohol and twitter I don't know where I would be.

I like it when you tweet dirty to me.

Now I know to avoid those who wear true religion, Ed Hardy, Affliction and straight men who wear pants tighter than mine.

Yep....I'm still drunk.
Arnold Palmer + Vodka = John Daly

Highly recommend.

So if you don't like me using twitter as a place to vent what's on my heart, mind & soul then unfollow or go fuck yourself.

Some of the mushy tweets make me want to vomit. Cut the crap people.

Never leave me alone with a bottle of good vodka and twitter.

Can I PLEASE get like 10 more followers to get to 300 then I'll pay for favestar and give y'all trophies n shit.

I smell like a fucking brisket.

You can fix an ugly body but it's a hell of a lot harder to fix an ugly face.

It's time for some pills!

Never assume I'm being serious on here. Bc 96.2% of the time the shit that come out of my mouth is just a bunch of BS.

When we were little my older cousin Joshy stated to his parents that he wanted to be Marv Albert when he grew up.

This is twitter where if you like something you give it a gold star bc it's far superior than anything on Facebook. We don't like. We STAR!

I follow a very diverse group of ppl but Is it wrong that I prefer to follow good looking white men on twitter? (Especially the single ones)

Maybe if I got fucked more regularly I wouldn't be such a cunt bitch all the time.

Hey cunts, assholes, scum bags & douches my birthday is exactly one month from today. Just thought I'd share that with y'all! Love y'all!!!