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  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    One of the worst things about being deaf has to be the inability to tell whether people are yawning or screaming...

    • 1,411
    • FAVS
    NOLABOY33HajraPzaiCJazzumglmm31LillyBelle18quincy507justlivinglikeUThatguysuspence
    • 640
    • RETWEETS
    RachelWeeumsjustlivinglikeUPaperWashanncairns_annxXFaithFoolXxWillGarciaMusicnayele18SAL_98um
    WonderMonkey78JiminyKicksItNorthside_MikeMr_goose007Carmel_ColemanGroperClevelandgrumpysalmonpiplipsthenamesmikeGWendieHutchlvvzziamk1tsMarty3point0______BarebakAssassin1knotwholegavinpivottsameblackshoes1__calluptomePrecociousLil____
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    The thing about human relationships is that one person can be so overcome by a moment while the other person is thinking about KFC chicken..

    • 1,025
    • FAVS
    Laredo8307jaslakhmnaMacKoolioSTRYDER_INConume_krissy_pageBeingConfuciusTweenyx
    • 517
    • RETWEETS
    J_rue316BambieCakesTinkerbell_VirgoSherryBeingConfuciusTweenyxPedders_torieannesalt
    Carmel_Colemanchopper4jklllvvvzzzKelleysBreakRmTortilla_Nazi
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    "Cumming" sounds gross. I think I'd start calling it "going number 3"...

    • 835
    • FAVS
    HajraPzaiBakesMan40LLKecklerCJazzumglmm31vodkasighsjbewickNeilMc412
    • 302
    • RETWEETS
    CJazzumYungsass666vodkasighElodeaJPaperWashVirgoSherryonume_BeingConfucius
    Carmel_ColemanSideBurnyMrsGoose69
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    When you see only one set of footprints, know that I unfollowed you. - Jesus Christ...

    • 736
    • FAVS
    MacKoolioMaui_Speaks______VirgoSherryNoelCastanzaonume_nyax6torieannesaltmdob11
    • 362
    • RETWEETS
    Tinkerbell_VirgoSherryNoelCastanzaonume_Daveylevinsohnspin033torieannesaltMaxine12333
    GeminiJewJuiceticlesgoreysgirl________DealwithIt5______kervinf__________
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    What I love most about burger is, as you eat it, it creates a pie chart of how much is left...

    • 550
    • FAVS
    VirgoSherryonume_BeingConfuciusTattleTSisterUrWindowStalkinanwer844Tweenyxtorieannesalt
    • 216
    • RETWEETS
    onume_BeingConfuciusTattleTSisterUrWindowStalkinMaxine12333redpawn3Ratchet7DonNot0nDrugs
    RockKrallerFirawesomeGreenSmoke_
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    *gay guy hits on me*
    ME: I'm straight.
    GAY GUY: So is spaghetti, until it's hot & wet.
    If any man gets to have me, it's this dude...

    • 458
    • FAVS
    KWQuacksPS_IRuddYoullvvzzhappy_bunny_77trialfemmePeachyiskVocabuLarryPixxiE_DusT_
    • 248
    • RETWEETS
    Ochy_ZacharyVirgoSherryTeeeeeaspooooonViolent2Dope304onume_Postinnesnesyinpoco
    VirgoSherryshanethevein
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    RIP is the LOL of dying...

    • 519
    • FAVS
    onume_BeingConfuciusTweenyxnyax6torieannesaltkarenvogel920mdob11ashlipingry
    • 163
    • RETWEETS
    onume_redpawn3PaperWashRyder2525Lola_StylescigarinMaxine12333TheKandil
    kervinf__________shhhmegs__________smilum77
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    On Facebook, someone posted that they have 90 days of pregnancy left. The 1st commenter said 'when are you due?' This is why we are here...

    • 437
    • FAVS
    VirgoSherryonume_BeingConfuciusnyax6karenvogel920mdob11redpawn3shari50514
    • 154
    • RETWEETS
    onume_BeingConfuciusmellimellePr3ttySt3llaWanjalasingo_saitagaHed04Juniormuri
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    Remember to always wink at God when you blaspheme so he knows you're joking!...

    • 465
    • FAVS
    ThePhoenixOonume_BeingConfuciuscynthiacallisonredpawn3RandomThoughtXODenymesanitymellimelle
    • 109
    • RETWEETS
    erkskionume_BeingConfuciusVN_RubenCarmel_ColemanmellimellebenerdistPaperWash
    Carmel_Colemandephrankkervinf__________
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    Not going to force my religion down my son's throat. I'd explain the differences & when the time comes, he can choose either Marvel or DC...

    • 311
    • FAVS
    onume_BeingConfuciusMmeLaCroozTheBlackVilainmdob11Skipper_Mayredpawn3Rhendi_
    • 248
    • RETWEETS
    onume_TheBlackVilainSkipper_MayJreijTTheSueeFirawesomeNames_Seankinjeketile
    Carmel_ColemanMaxine12333notfaizzy
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    CASHIER: 300.

    ME: Ha, like the movie.

    CASHIER: Nice one, Seinfeld.

    ME: Ha, like the comedian.

    CASHIER: ...

    ME: Ha, like a mime...

    • 392
    • FAVS
    onume_BeingConfuciusLuc_Lionnyax6mdob11redpawn3Noorologist101jas508
    • 167
    • RETWEETS
    Luc_LionPrettiestPickleFaisalMosesFirawesomeRatchet7Donfantasticfox007JeezyOceansbreatheandlove
    BuddyAckerswiftenhaalVodkaMary
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    After a bad day, I remind myself that somewhere in the world, some guy just started shiting without noticing he's out of toilet paper...

    • 326
    • FAVS
    topsixrowsbaciiv143sternHighHellion_xoericbovePaperWashVirgoSherryonume_
    • 93
    • RETWEETS
    topsixrowsRatchet7Don143sternPaperWashonume_BeingConfuciusfavstar_historyMyCanadianRoots
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    Jesus, people!! I suggest twitter gets a pop up saying "Are you sure?" then another saying "No seriously, You REALLY wanna tweet that??"...

    • 312
    • FAVS
    topsixrowsglmm31ericbovesheepydelPaperWashonume_BeingConfuciusnyax6
    • 57
    • RETWEETS
    topsixrowsPaperWashonume_VN_RubenDipxsssLydiaMzolaMaxine12333ExploringUrMind
    Maxine12333KelFocker
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    Note that when the power's out & all device batteries are dead, the square things are called books & the moving objects are other humans...

    • 172
    • FAVS
    baciivYungLodgeSkinsKireiOnirbooksmanPaperWashonume_BeingConfuciusCarmel_Coleman
    • 112
    • RETWEETS
    NoOrdinaryGalKcIvashniwrstew5150Melissa94307britnibakerPaperWashBeingConfuciusTweenyx
    Tweenyxpiplips
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    A fly just dropped in my soup & died instantly. Not eating anymore. It's not that I'm disgusted. But why did it die instantly?...

    • 187
    • FAVS
    VirgoSherryStill_Loves_UTraceykemp8inconsequentia2onume_BeingConfuciusnyax6Arroia
    • 38
    • RETWEETS
    MatthewDNewbyinconsequentia2onume_DanielGaronchrishitlerclitTheDailySchmuckExitThaWarriorIlliter8
    KelFocker
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    Once, on Twitter, I followed a woman & she followed me back & we laughed & talked about life & how she was a man from Brooklyn...

    • 142
    • FAVS
    PRESTONinCOLORCarmel_Colemanonume_BeingConfuciusPrettiestPicklenyax6inconsequentia2mdob11
    • 66
    • RETWEETS
    Carmel_Colemanonume_BeingConfuciusMaxine12333MidgetsparKayRantsOne_FineMessHappyGoFuckidy
    Maxine12333
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    My social skills have improved since I found twitter. Only problem is, I don't leave the house anymore...

    • 168
    • FAVS
    VirgoSherrynazwildonezed0748onume_justlivinglikeUBeingConfuciusnyax6inconsequentia2
    • 35
    • RETWEETS
    zed0748onume_justlivinglikeUBeingConfuciusMaxine12333BojaaaTickTacFoeTheVictxr
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    So many lost people in the world. People in jail, those kids in Narnia, people that aren't following me on here, it's just so sad really...

    • 111
    • FAVS
    MacKoolioonume_BeingConfuciusPrettiestPickleAndyKirchnerkatehurley4BlueHaiku2inconsequentia2
    • 56
    • RETWEETS
    onume_inconsequentia2AlisonzombielanJessG828dpazMaxine12333favstar1000favsESalvona
    Toy_A101
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    Just saw my elementary school teacher. Loved her. She blew up a balloon for me once & I stole little gulps of her breath from it all day...

    • 120
    • FAVS
    onume_BeingConfuciusPrettiestPicklenyax6_PBody__TheBlindLemonMaxine12333JulieeBuii
    • 45
    • RETWEETS
    shinasaphraonume__PBody__Maxine12333skullpuppy11inconsequentia2Jennifergr8shesananteater
    TheDailySchmuck
  • thetobbie
      TO33IE @thetobbie

    Every time I see a young nurse attending to a young patient, porn music starts playing in my head...

    • 142
    • FAVS
    VirgoSherryonume_BeingConfuciusPrettiestPicklenyax6inconsequentia2FRANKATROCIOUSDivineLately______
    • 18
    • RETWEETS
    onume_BeingConfuciusFRANKSTALICIOUSmaulifufffavstar1000favsSaraESpiveyPulse_NYCmarimaricomcast
@thetobbie

@thetobbie

free bird