• G'Day!

    Please Sign In

    Favstar gets even better if you sign in.

    Here's why signing in is good for you.

    • You get a personalized view of Favstar based on the people you follow.
    • Your favs and retweets are collected instantly, meaning your status and stats get updated at blazing speeds.
    • Use lists to manage your friends, and keep on top of where the fav-love is happening.

    Your account is safe, of course!

    • We never see your twitter password.
    • We won't tweet or follow anyone without your permission.
    • We only use your API calls when you fav, retweet, or follow someone.
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    Fuck it, I'm resigning too.

    • 3,918
    • FAVS
    Lars9596AlaskaSweetelinbenjaminHacknSprayJDoody523deehitcherpamnabeaUniquely_Spun
    • 14k
    • RETWEETS
    zoeallenmeDelPureLizPrevenasdeehitcherKNH4my_boy_joeyAngThomasscharlzero
    moxieblogger
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    The reason I didn't mention dinosaurs in the Bible is shut up.

    • 2,786
    • FAVS
    xxmrbannanamanxplasmurfHeartles_HarlotAdroitTellurianmy_boy_joeyTSHaunted1313KayNdyqdoompencils
    • 7,750
    • RETWEETS
    xxmrbannanamanxAlaskaSweetjjhdabestEx_Stormtrooperthongbeardcharisma_creedRG_Samintrinsic51
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    Next time you're tempted to masturbate, remember that I'm watching you, and also masturbating.

    • 2,546
    • FAVS
    MatthewFEdwardsBethywhite13Abby_TunesschwarzblondgunisigisarkisidoompencilsthongbeardMr_Cuff
    • 7,862
    • RETWEETS
    zara_02LuvmeStudiothongbeardG_rncharElliotFreshdeadlycowJoakimPersson7Wyatt271828
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    St. Patrick is already totally shit-faced.

    • 1,529
    • FAVS
    Talkinghands69thongbeardRichard_KeeplovelyanathemaKittySaysMeeowHappyForHaloalexfoxgillJennyG97
    • 8,312
    • RETWEETS
    BraydenJMacKeanBizGilbertharrygilbert758GameBreakerXxmeghandersenMiloIsAwsomeOfficialMc_Coyikingsley12
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    Any atheist who retweets this is going to hell for eternity.

    • 943
    • FAVS
    dennisx619hann_marie95Wigger0784talacecyanslowlyVodkaninjamdev71capttyphoon
    • 8,820
    • RETWEETS
    JimBardhilevp0no0nejason_velocity_SuramihypegeoMrAssadKhanrandy_longoria
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    I send natural disasters to punish mankind for being stupid enough to believe in a God who would send natural disasters to punish it.

    • 2,021
    • FAVS
    Richard_KeepEHMHJVee_kassabianFluffdaFlamingo_Kayters_Brian_HennessyCornaumHeronSays
    • 7,473
    • RETWEETS
    El_griyoneomilanFluffdaFlamingoFruela19kashisH2so4judelmeisterScumbagKonflictgailm61
    Voiceofgarth
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    You're welcome.

    • 1,892
    • FAVS
    Talkinghands69Richard_Keepsoulwhispers3Tristan_Boggs13MRMILKY619DuzhHeronSaysJovanaMackarka
    • 7,277
    • RETWEETS
    babebullNicksEdwardsNicki_FrenchNellySobalvarroASecretTweetNarcissist_Rantcharlzerommarlet_
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    I don't believe in most of you either.

    • 1,652
    • FAVS
    lovelyanathemaTalkinghands69tory_hisRichard_Keepheller_9Noahjnetshwetlanaaddelac
    • 6,498
    • RETWEETS
    telia_fenwickEl_griyobrainnartddelacOtaku_ErrantepedodebrujaDrBafuscuntybollox59
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    THE NEW 10 PLAGUES

    1. Homophobia
    2. Bad wi-fi
    3. Kardashians
    4. Meth
    5. Uggs
    6. Hipsterism
    7. CO2
    8. Facebook
    9. Indifference
    10. Beyoncé

    • 1,999
    • FAVS
    xxmrbannanamanxJess4ya1970RobDASSTnewsSaraEricaXXXHulbertJonhellosilkaLars9596
    • 5,483
    • RETWEETS
    xxmrbannanamanxkenatoskaWayeJARedrantingtoryEz4u2say_JanismcarsonaosohctshirtsMrCrisp_
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    Happy Earth Day to you.
    Happy Earth Day to you.
    Happy Earth Day, dear planet we're destroying.
    Happy Earth Day to you.

    • 1,440
    • FAVS
    paigethurstonLytharInfN555Dannii_9890Richard_KeepMoominpopsDave002689RainbowRiverArt
    • 5,800
    • RETWEETS
    Dannii_9890RainbowRiverArtMetal_MinaFouliiiicool19bexfatherkarrasjawedzebralivvylight
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    April Fool's! I don't even HAVE a son!

    • 1,872
    • FAVS
    paigethurstonBethywhite13LytharAbby_TuneskatekeltonHey_HollyLujahKyleHeslerRichard_Keep
    • 5,134
    • RETWEETS
    zara_02Hey_HollyLujahShannon_YatesDeeps_deventedbrainnartsibrusJinnobearMorenito2k12
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    The best thing about atheists is they never blame Me.

    • 1,991
    • FAVS
    paigethurstonmelissa_gromekh_fishhsuzanwonderDennisGuibocheCoriBThaTwinBryantCares3JessicaRabbit
    • 4,610
    • RETWEETS
    DJTunersTerribleBassistleovaz_11pratikadkbinubiragHenley1993Pbsheahanwxthree
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    I know something you don't know.

    • 1,115
    • FAVS
    Talkinghands69HENRIMKkatekeltonRichard_KeepjbmcwillieRoyTristanEmer_FoleyIceheart104
    • 5,219
    • RETWEETS
    HENRIMKsandeepchahelKarminaWyderkapatt0022Mitchie_TitaniaermyneeePauOAlegriamichelleagathos
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    "Scientology" is a combination of "scient-," meaning "science," and "-ology," meaning "science." And it just gets stupider from there.

    • 1,772
    • FAVS
    Talkinghands69MidnightMartiniLiliaNyax3alisaterryRichard_KeeplovelyanathemaLukutis343EHMHJ
    • 4,545
    • RETWEETS
    Guy_Smiley_slaughlin12SapepaSAChryzjinsrsovuljakWayWardSon_03MLP_rainrunnerraymotaung
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    The universe is at 2% and I can't find My charger.

    • 1,628
    • FAVS
    martygibbonsGodsGoodGirlMeAbby_TunesTalkinghands69thongbeardjainnitiLiliaNyax3Richard_Keep
    • 4,634
    • RETWEETS
    DJTunersSallyMSydneyEl_griyoRonaldRaygunStuemmareid1331amusedinredFernandoSimonstrippintim00
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    Jesus died for your sins, so make 'em fun.

    • 1,364
    • FAVS
    howbeautifulRichard_KeepjbmcwillieRashedaAlammedic_from_hellwaa1964lizbug_96Whiskey_Man
    • 4,736
    • RETWEETS
    _Marlene_AShannon_YatesRashedaAlamkeithpenguinNaomiPascoe1livvylightShazzerbBurkeTrogdorbad
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    Remember to set your clocks back an hour today. If you'd like to set it back fifty years, please remember to vote for Mitt Romney Tuesday.

    • 1,062
    • FAVS
    thongbeardRichard_KeepSmokePaintLoveTrigg3rHippieCalhounMBHeronSaysPomodoriummoxieblogger
    • 5,037
    • RETWEETS
    PhoenyxJameslouiszeoli23bf1337ClarissaLinetTdaffyrapedbugsgaysexualmuffinRJ_kumarkumarbingwuclass
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    Every single word in the Bible is true. It's only when you group them together as sentences that they start getting iffy.

    • 1,968
    • FAVS
    thongbeardRestarrtsFervixCginanickoloffbobguard943alisaterryMoominpopsjbmcwillie
    • 3,960
    • RETWEETS
    GarlandjohnnyMizz_iMiangryhamster09SheerDropzDeeps_deventedAGoddessZValerieCoolerZealousOutcast
    Voiceofgarth
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    Sorry! My bad.

    • 971
    • FAVS
    Talkinghands69SmokePaintLovemelissadupreHeronSayscharlzerohaplitoKourtneyRae8Elephart
    • 4,954
    • RETWEETS
    ChuppacadabraleozzeiJuliaPerlkvistAKenyanDudeJUDYDESJARLAISWiccetrixBpadalluvSyaxoxo_
  • TheTweetOfGod
      God @TheTweetOfGod

    Since yesterday was the National Day of Prayer, today must be the National Day of Disappointment.

    • 1,750
    • FAVS
    xxmrbannanamanxrboyd6paigethurstondelviktFairAprilebarnadezanyxannaraevenousss
    • 3,962
    • RETWEETS
    BoenkOpPattyspaghettiRobdog_1eddbutcherzara_02PetaRilesG1__GNiamhAnseo
@TheTweetOfGod is a Pro Member,
so their pages have the "more" button.
To have the "more" button on all pages, and to ensure everyone can see all of your awesome tweets, become a Pro Member today!
More

God’s Best Tweets

@TheTweetOfGod

@TheTweetOfGod
Pro

I’m your dope-ass divinity, trollin’ with My trinity, tossin’ top tweets in your immediate vicinity, flingin’ fly phrases from the fringes of infinity.