Always remember that what doesn't kill you will eventually kill you

We are not delusional @john27mufc we all just drank from the Kool Aid labeled "Bad Mother Fuckers" after @freejessejames did.

If it wasn't for Fat Chicks I would have been a virgin until I was 27

Is it kosher to eat ass?

I'm not personally condoning rape but someone has to teach that little mother fucker that delivers my newspaper in the morning a lession

This is that moment in everyone's day after their coffee when they realize that last nights dead hooker isn't going to dig her own hole

At what point does autoerotic asphyxiation turn into choking the homeless guy while he beats off for the $50 you gave him?

'twas the day before Christmas and all thru da hood, Not a Pimp hand been raise, cuz dim Hos had been good!

Lightening never strikes in the same place twice until it does.

You ever have one of those "I wish I hadn't just jacked off because I could really enjoy jacking off right now" moments

I'm gonna go ahead and throw this out here, I'm sexy as fuck to be this God dammed old.

When life hands you lemons, throw them at your boss then fuck his 17yo daughter.

@mdhoy know why White Jesus doesn't eat M&M's?








Because they fall thru the holes in his hands

"Now I got tha World swingin' by my nutts, Damn it feels good to be a Gangsta..."
-Geto Boys

@freejessejames thank for keeping the dream alive. #WCC pic.twitter.com/bhJI6IjZ

I'd suck your daddies dick just so I could taste where you came from. #bestpickupline

I stopped by @austinspeedshop on Friday and met @freejessejames thanks for the beer and here is my keychain pic.twitter.com/J6otH7Eiom

A funny thing happened on my way to give a fuck!

If you're the kinda girl that boast about inserting things into her vagina, you're the girl I wanna introduce to my Mom.

Serena Williams has won 27 Grand Slam Titles but I will always remember her major motion picture debut as The Predator