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She wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts, she's cheer captain and I'm a 30 year old man who has no business at this high school.
That band in heaven everyone's always talking about were just told they suck by Lou Reed.
Brooklyn 99 and 12 Years a Slave are equals.
The most far fetched thing about RoboCop is a he's a cop without a mustache.
According to Facebook a kid I knew in high school is tragically now just a BMW logo.
Bill Cosby hasn't talked about pudding in decades. Let's all let this go.
"Young dumb and full of PaRumPaPumPum." - the Little Drummer Boy's Twitter bio
Barack and Michelle slow dancing should be televised once a week to remind Americans what love is.
My favorite part about the new Godzilla is his handlebar mustache.
Sign my petition to have Pope Francis host SNL.
Whoever called horse riders "equestrians" and not "horserers" is a criminal.
The original title of Full House was Ghost Mom but then they dropped the whole "ghost mom" element.
"We're adults now, so please, call us James Eat World."
The plan to arm school principals is great if you think making a sequel to Kindergarten Cop is more important than defending children.
Live from the cheap seats! comic/writer/fot http://timduffy.tumblr.com/ http://favstar.fm/users/TimDuffy