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My all time fave nickname is "hey you with the tits"
best prank yet: try to pay off your debt while putting money in a high interest savings account
Don't assume my posts are about you, but if you are affected by them you are obviously guilty of something
Maybe I didn't get the job because I was fanning myself with his tie. Who knows anymore.
People all over the world are anxiously awaiting Facebook to add a dislike button. What a time to be alive.
whoever emailed the leader of my street gang and told him about my misshapen genitalia has a lot of fucking nerve
5-year-old: *turns off the TV when I walk in*
Me: Was that-
5: I just wanted to see what Captain Kirk-
Me: THIS IS A STAR WARS HOUSE!
If u drink the blue liquid from a Magic 8-Ball u can see the future trust me my friend Keith did once & said he was gonna die & then he did
I made you a medical I.D. bracelet. It's just a picture of boobs but it may save your life one day.
I'm not sure what to do next so I'll just sit here eating fistfuls of candy and not make eye contact.
*Notices that boss is about to walk into glass door*
*Lets nature run its course*
The King of the Trailer Park
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