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there is a disturbing number of digimon who can shoot missiles from their nipples
I called my dad & asked for a ride home & he said yes I asked when & he said "after I make your mom cum" Looks like he wont be picking me up
Grade 2: I pissed myself in school and told the teacher I slipped in a puddle. I smelled like piss. She knew it was piss.
It's a good thing I don't have Favstar bonus features because I would give far too many Tweet of the Day awards, you know? One a day.
"Horses are smart, beautiful creatures." No, if horses were smart, they'd put their large muscular bodies to use & become KILLING MACHINES.
Twitter's resident Titlord Supreme. All I talk about is sex and video games. Nobody likes me. I do not make jokes. #steakslap2012