There sure are a lot of fucking rules for a person to be able to say whatever they want.

Most women are turned on by roses,chocolate and wine. I'm turned on by having a cock shoved so far down my throat my eyes water.

I'm still not real sure how this shit works. Am I talking to myself?

Some of you make me want to touch my lady parts and others make me want to touch your lady parts.

Where the hell is #team fuckmeback?

Twitter: were every available guy is married.

There is absolutely no reason why I shouldn't be getting my pussy licked at this very moment.

Twitter Elite:
If you star them, they don't follow.

Does anyone ever tweet anything serious? All I have seen is drinking vodka and masturbating shouldn't that be on that trending thing?

Asked a coworker during lunch if she wanted to come over for dinner and drinks tonight after work. She declined, but when do untie her?

Religion for beginners:
Rule #1
Don't run out of weed.
Rule #2


Muffins.

Holy Shit.
Your fucking head moved.
I want mine to nod up and down!

I'm going to dream of the one who I wished knew I existed.

You may even know who you are...

Is sitting on a wine bottle while tweeting against any rules?
I know how picky you fuckers get!

I'm getting good and high and naked at some point today.

Unrelated: I'm not wearing a bra.

I bet my pussy could shoot you out 3 feet.

I haven't been on this site in awhile. I was busy shitting all over my exes new girlfriends facebook wall. I hope you enjoy the clap bitch.

I stayed up all night to watch her sleep knowing a woman that fucking awesome had to be a dream.

I just got fucked from behind in the bathroom so hard and good, my legs are going to shake all day.

Cookies are little fresh baked celebrations.