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They say Voldemort almost 200 times in Django Unchained.
FUCK GOOD COP/BAD COP. IT'S TIME FOR TIMECOP/ROBOCOP.
Next time I see a guy with teardrop tattoos, I'm gonna put my hand on his shoulder and say, "Awww what's the matter, lil fella?"
Feminists don't seem to like it when you refer to "Roe vs Wade" as "Man vs Food".
HIP HOP IS DAD
I did a new comic. http://www.vice.com/read/bb-teeth?Contentpage=-1 …
The 6th sense is actually just the sense of hopelessness.
FUCK/MARRY/KILL ISN'T A GAME, IT'S FUCKING LIFE.
Tumblr: The Cliff-Notes: "I'M A MARGINALLY ATTRACTIVE GIRL WHO WOULD RATHER EAT PIZZA/CHICKEN MCNUGGETS THAN HAVE SEX LIZLEMON QUIRKYLOL".
This new memory pillow is horrible at soaking up my tears. Is this why astronauts look so lonely in their sad helmets?!
South Koreans have souls and can go to heaven, but North Koreans can only turn into ghosts.
Breaking up with a girl sucks because you have to be a suicide hotline operator for a day.
"Foot in mouth" isn't a disease. It's a fun night with a box of wine and a girl who doesn't fuck around.
If you fuck a dude with a periodic table shower curtain, study it as much as possible and then poison him because he's a fucking loser