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Drawing people for $$ and attention like this: pic.twitter.com/mOTLHuhaay
Next time I see a guy with teardrop tattoos, I'm gonna put my hand on his shoulder and say, "Awww what's the matter, lil fella?"
Feminists don't seem to like it when you refer to "Roe vs Wade" as "Man vs Food".
Tumblr: The Cliff-Notes: "I'M A MARGINALLY ATTRACTIVE GIRL WHO WOULD RATHER EAT PIZZA/CHICKEN MCNUGGETS THAN HAVE SEX LIZLEMON QUIRKYLOL".
This new memory pillow is horrible at soaking up my tears. Is this why astronauts look so lonely in their sad helmets?!
ANNNND here is the newest girl pop band album I made with my wife: http://www.adultrykidding.com/
NEW ADULTRY KIDDING ALBUM, PRO-ANA AMATEUR EATER http://www.adultrykidding.com pic.twitter.com/tM1B5gy9
South Koreans have souls and can go to heaven, but North Koreans can only turn into ghosts.
Breaking up with a girl sucks because you have to be a suicide hotline operator for a day.
"Foot in mouth" isn't a disease. It's a fun night with a box of wine and a girl who doesn't fuck around.
If you fuck a dude with a periodic table shower curtain, study it as much as possible and then poison him because he's a fucking loser
THE KAT STACKS KID.
