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  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    I love walking on the beach with my girlfriend until the acid wears off and I’m just dragging a stolen mannequin around a Target car park.

    • 2,017
    • FAVS
    bigdaddydballsCardinalCGTheSolClarkeGreGooglyMooglyerinberrypieNaked_SupermanLeesa_Littleeshurne
    • 1,502
    • RETWEETS
    InterstellarFUKonume_GreGooglyMooglyerinberrypiehippiemarkMoody_Loner__Stevie_Talkperilous_sin______
    BonaFideIntentSlayerSays________Lipgloss_NerdMasterOfFurybrakcoLipgloss_NerdAllyBallyBealVoilaTyle________CelebrityChezVashWdsUnspokenTuna_LoverlvvzzTrueTorontoGirlkarencreets______piplipsCarmel_Coleman5haelLipgloss_NerdNikiWithIssuesThedudishExploringUrMind__Kali_Mura
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    The best way to keep a woman happy for the rest of her life is to make her laugh.

    • 1,067
    • FAVS
    montanamissoulaOldJunkyardDawgSinDancingVixenfadzlisamsudinNour_AboodiLostHopeless_TerraSheacarojacoub
    • 598
    • RETWEETS
    HendTalkhawymyriamkh3iBurnL7sMsElindiHanniballadImTheSheriffcarojacoubCassyRoseHill
    _xLNcSoo_Scandalousskamtweetingrain247manmoiragallagaMizBlueBallsThe_SculptressSergioValenCoLipgloss_NerdThe_MartiniGirlCrazedinNYC______
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    When you find someone that accepts, understands, and truly loves the crazy in you, do everything you can to never lose them.

    • 881
    • FAVS
    FanBoyBoyWickedKatieStevie_TalkprawanyaTailgateTramp____VonBrutal________JiminyKicksItSmugAsshole
    • 529
    • RETWEETS
    tayjordann14____SerenittyHopemoses_katie_Sabi18_tocahontasKoryMcEvoy1______Stevie_Talkangrypumpkins
    Stevie_TalkscratchysinghwickedmayfairLuckyLea13see_more13mochanyacumbersomeonewesjohnson8Lipgloss_NerdCuntemplateFloatersfinestMomfiabeingtheo________
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    Sometimes you have to burn those fucking bridges just to make sure you never return.

    • 839
    • FAVS
    CheyQuantrelleshurneStevie_TalkgokananasSacamanoBBeenToHellPaljfcarpioa_cakebaby
    • 491
    • RETWEETS
    VonBrutal________CathTramell______RoadDieselChristine_Who_SmugAssholefloatingturtlesGhazzzomizvn_qstna
    shadoniumSlayerSays________DocBrown21indigofizznativerogueJanuaryJamesEvokeMewickedmayfairLipgloss_Nerd
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    That job interview was going so well until I realized I was fucked up on acid in the middle of a cornfield naked and talking to a scarecrow.

    • 933
    • FAVS
    eshurneLorraine13Y______stoneysaraStevie_TalkHysteriaBarbieBeenToHellPalHonoLuishruglord
    • 329
    • RETWEETS
    Joe7_lfcgiggidyStevie_TalkJabberrantN8Howard31mahatmatweeterGimpySunshine____FaraJaque
    FragileFriend____VampiliciousXoRaccoonWhiskeyFredPollackKennedydp5
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    If you think I’m doing Twitter wrong you should see the way I do relationships.

    • 735
    • FAVS
    ShoegasmicStevie_TalkSacamanoBBeenToHellPalAbsolut_JennMiss___Yi________TailgateTramp____VonBrutal________
    • 367
    • RETWEETS
    doobwoobAbsolut_Jenna_cakebabyMiss___Yi________BberrySurpriseVonBrutal________sweetg35ReDHeaDeDTaRT____
    green_babe_LastMermaid__Lipgloss_Nerd
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    Never misinterpret the amount of ink someone has on their body as a lack of intelligence, compassion and understanding.

    • 662
    • FAVS
    Stevie_TalkBeenToHellPalVonBrutal________JiminyKicksItSmugAssholesweetg35grimpossibleArdentlymeXD
    • 329
    • RETWEETS
    VonBrutal________veronicazodeebee1196FahmiHzzzTattooedMiseryAmberR49inconsequentia2deborahsixx
    miss_fkn508JadedChainsLipglosslesboLipgloss_NerdSinLegionJeanneMLB
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    The worst thing about hitting rock bottom is finding a shovel and a note that says ‘keep digging motherfucker’.

    • 549
    • FAVS
    AngneedshelpStevie_TalkEE_Von_Eanjuroy06a_cakebabyTailgateTramp____Notorious_DaniJagMGman__________
    • 335
    • RETWEETS
    DrunkCocobujoobachhaBrony_Shitsukhorndoma_cakebabyVonBrutal________ahmad_stacySmugAsshole
    RudeRidingRomeoKimJungilSpirit__STUPIDiesmGingerliciousMe__Floatersfinest_Gambrinous______DocBrown21HonestMissLipgloss_NerdThedudish
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    If you're ever looking for a partner that's truly loyal, I'd suggest you visit an animal shelter and pick out a puppy.

    • 639
    • FAVS
    BeenToHellPalVonBrutal________JiminyKicksItSmugAssholegrimpossiblevaindreamsweetg35ArdentlymeXD
    • 237
    • RETWEETS
    sapphireeyezzinconsequentia2sworkman33AlyciaBeautifulRudeRidingRomeoroccafella313megan4hand________bobbyjames2750____
    robyn_vo
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    It might be the darkness in my heart that is so addicted to the light in yours.

    • 567
    • FAVS
    KerenTubsgurjeetBhamrahthatdopebetchDirty_Secrets69witherownwingsfsrachagain_____amaranthiinecyn_devil
    • 293
    • RETWEETS
    ClassyAshiJade_Showersi_have_life______SoosMuta______Dirty_Secrets69Mehrwanekaeshonyathunderinmysoul
    DiaperSlingernativerogueCherrym_1982
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    They’re just words but sometimes they heal and sometimes they mend and sometimes they burn.

    • 497
    • FAVS
    HannahPaul_O______christinastrigaTheCAbeachescarojacoubBeenToHellPalangiespr23a_cakebabyVonBrutal________
    • 279
    • RETWEETS
    HannahPaul_O______christinastrigaTheCAbeacheskyanrox_AditiChawlaSmugAsshole_Always_Laugh_____bobbyjames2750____
    byronblurbSTUPIDiesmLipgloss_NerdNotJPobourbonmelikeyLipgloss_Nerd
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    I only get disappointed by people when I have high expectations, or low expectations, or just expectations.

    • 495
    • FAVS
    SeanInCypressa_cakebabyVonBrutal________JiminyKicksItSmugAssholeChristine_Who_bunnypie75lacybronze1
    • 269
    • RETWEETS
    favstar_historya_cakebabyChristine_Who_MasterOfFurydlvsudmagenta_crayons__iamsexified11_pravin
    NoorShammaWistfulBlue______Lipgloss_NerdTat6277__________
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    My favorite yoga position is where I lie on the floor with my teddy bear and fall asleep.

    • 571
    • FAVS
    logospilgrimBeenToHellPalVonBrutal________JiminyKicksItSmugAssholeMasterOfFurygrimpossiblesweetg35
    • 191
    • RETWEETS
    3angels4suremwachmwachChardcore15NymphoFor________Tha69Man__BonaFideIntentSuperstarLisaGExquisitelyEva
    WistfulBlue______piplips
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    I'd give up ice cream forever to have you wake up next to me for the rest of my life.

    • 527
    • FAVS
    SSparklesDailySacamanoBvodkaNcuddlesTailgateTramp____LuvPugVonBrutal________JiminyKicksItSmugAsshole
    • 191
    • RETWEETS
    TailgateTramp____VonBrutal________sassiemeow________GimpySunshine____Rleapsterdorisdykesisabetha13ispypanda
    jehujeniLipgloss_Nerd
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    If your girlfriends severe mood swings don’t make you want to run into oncoming traffic, she’s probably a fucking keeper.

    • 450
    • FAVS
    ashleybarilBrunetteBetchReeMURDAVonBrutal________JiminyKicksItSmugAssholeMindBytessweetg35
    • 236
    • RETWEETS
    TailgateTramp____VonBrutal________Peete60__________iambersuntruth_absolutschmutzigliebeGimpySunshine____TransaparenT
    Momfia
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    Being an adult is when you have more nightmares while awake than you do when asleep.

    • 412
    • FAVS
    thatdopebetchillvminationhnsclntrrsSammy__33Bounse44navanaxkeeetymammaTheFlyInTheRoom
    • 265
    • RETWEETS
    bujoobachhafahmyamr7PosterZosaSammy__33BeenToHellPalmazenosama0tim_goddenHornyDevilxxx
    NoLuckNeededVintageBabe1212lishybee__________Lipgloss_NerdJust_Lee_1Lipgloss_Nerd
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    I imagine being voted sexiest man on Twitter is the equivalent to being voted best looking bitch in a maximum security prison.

    • 533
    • FAVS
    chrismerrillhythemafiaBeenToHellPalJabberrantVonBrutal________JiminyKicksItSmugAssholeMindBytes
    • 106
    • RETWEETS
    hythemafiaJabberrantrovingthoughtDustyHumeamaniwf__________greyeyes66CelticMoonDanceToniRaviolli
    fromthechi________PyrBlissBarebakAssassinShazzaLMMikeJeffJordanSinLegion
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    Its so relaxing skipping stones over a pond until the acid wears off and you're just tossing bricks over your neighbors fence into his pool.

    • 489
    • FAVS
    VonBrutal________JiminyKicksItSmugAssholesweetg35grimpossibleArdentlymeXD_fucknoxiousweghaw
    • 137
    • RETWEETS
    lo_jo__inconsequentia2Lovelyinthe804____empbookGimpySunshine____kamtweetingTransaparenTTeflonPawn
    kamiekaymee__Out_The_Back
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    You can call your girlfriend moody, difficult, even hard work, but that's all insignificant if you can call her your best friend.

    • 425
    • FAVS
    rainandpeacea_cakebabyVonBrutal________JiminyKicksItSmugAssholehistwaddlelacybronze1grimpossible
    • 196
    • RETWEETS
    rainandpeacea_cakebabyJedi_MastressMasterOfFuryruffyoungn0tblondehaggis_headGimpySunshine____
    HestiaApollo_Ms_Moneypenny_Lipgloss_Nerd
  • UluwatuSiap
      That Rude Cunt @UluwatuSiap

    Karma said if you keep calling her a bitch she's going to show you what a bitch really is.

    • 412
    • FAVS
    valelucioparedsa_cakebabyVonBrutal________JiminyKicksItSmugAssholesweetg35grimpossiblethebarpro
    • 204
    • RETWEETS
    57thStateTweetrMichaelJavier19gabiizuanjfcarpiothebarproheatherlarson77__ArdentlymeXDthistletat13
    slyoung5Lipgloss_NerdKelFocker
@UluwatuSiap

@UluwatuSiap

@Lipgloss_Nerd and I are no longer here. Perhaps we never really were. Unfollow guilt free.