@Unept's (Adam C.) recently faved Tweets...
There has never been a greater need for more creative job titles than now.
Sincerely,
The High Emperor of Marketing
Sincerely,
The High Emperor of Marketing
5
What will I miss most when our youngest stops taking a bottle? Having something called the "nipple drawer."
4
1yr old is discarding the chocolate chips from his granola bar. Going to confront wife & find out who his real father is.
5
I'd rather see the gov't address the issue of geriatric drivers and their "unintended deceleration." You heard me, Larry King.
2
My iPhone is in the corner crying because I called it a "cell phone" after watching Steve Jobs introduce the #ipad.
2
I told 4yo to turn the other way when she coughs. So the next time, she turned all the way around to cough and farted in my face.
7
The best part about being male is seeing the body of an Olympian in the mirror after just 2 days of working out.
2
Anyone know the # for Merriam-Webster? My wife just used "happenstantially," and I'm certain they are unaware of its existence.
3
It takes 7 hard years to become the head grill cook at In-N-Out, but only minutes to become Wendy's Chief Microwave Operator.
2
If u ever need verbalize the need to go #1 and #2, you can save time by just saying, "I have to poo-rinate." You're welcome.
2
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