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Roses are Red, Violets are glorious. Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.
I found some salad dressing at the back of my fridge with a use by date of 21/12/12. I think it's Mayan-aise
First Thatcher dies then Fergie retires. Somewhere there is a scouser with a lamp and 1 wish left.
So North Korea have declared that they plan on invading Japan.
I personally wish them the best of luck with storming Takeshi's Castle
The first 1,000 people to Re-Tweet this will be get a Follow from Uni Lad! Who's it gonna be?!
They've done studies you know. 60% of the time, it works every time...