People are douchebags.
THE END

Even when you suspect it's coming, a knife in the back doesn't hurt any less.

I wish you guys could pop out of my phone like the hologram thingy from Star Wars cause
#BeerMe

Laughter is the best medicine and you guys are the syringe

Inject me

I ate a doughnut today

My definition of "bad girl" has changed immeasurably since I was twenty

No matter how interesting you guys are today,I HAVE to take a shower!
Wait,you can't see my stubble or smell my BO.....
Carry on.

I miss making out...

Slap it up, flip it, rub it down..

How much do I love twitter?Let me count the ways..
196
I have 196 followers..I love you all!
I have more love to give,just sayin
#followme

I solemnly swear to always follow more than are following

Because I'm not a douche

Damnit!All these cool people I want to follow but can't!I just really think its lame to have thousands of followers and you follow a few.

I was gonna follow you til I saw you had 20k followers and were only following 200

Lame

Something's gotta change or
Some things gonna change

Who needs actual RL neighbors
You guys are so much better

Fun, kid loving, semi-hot, intelligent woman about to be on the market...stand by...

#OverIt

I'm left handed so I do everything backwards. EVERYTHING.

Showcase your bits

Definitely one of the best zombie flicks of all time #ShaunOfTheDead

Thank you tiny lil eight pound six ounce baby Jesus, for ceiling fans. Amen.

I get it, no I get it

No, seriously I really do

..I don't get it..