I see 4chan is trending. Soon, scores of preteen girls will Google it to see what it is, stumble into /b/ and be forever scarred. Awesome.

❒Taken ❒Single ☑ I want ice cream

WHY DO PEOPLE NEED TO PUT PENISES ON EVERYTHING. WHAT WENT WRONG IN YOUR CHILDHOOD THAT MADE THIS AN ACCEPTABLE PRACTICE?!

#RulesForGirls Be seen and not heard. Your place is in the kitchen. That's where the knives are and he'll never know its coming.

So, wait, what? Tumblr is 'raiding' 4chan? Have you never heard the phrase, "Pissing in a sea of piss"? 'cause thats all you're doing.

Twitter, you need to do a name clearing. Anyone that hasn't tweeted in a year needs to GTFO.

#inelementaryschool YAY, POKEMON! #inmiddleschool Ew, pokemon? #inhighschool Pokemon? Un.Cool. #incollege FUCK YEAH POKEMON!!

Mental image of both harry potter and batman screaming MY PARENTS ARE DEEEAAAAD. Someone needs to make this happen.

"YOU KNOW, ZEBRAS DON'T CHANGE THEIR SPOTS." "Zebras have stripes." "SHUT UP, NESS. YOU'RE NOT A ZEBRA. YOU DON'T KNOW OUR PAIN."

Oh wow I come on twitter for the first time in a month and of course Shmoo and June are talking about vaginas.

dubstep thats entirely made up of DOOFDOOF BIDOOFDOOF BIDOOF DOOF DOOF DOOF DODODOOF DOOF DOOF BIDODODODOOF BIDOOFDOOF

TIRED? CAN'T SLEEP? HI, BILLY MAYS HERE WITH FUCK YOU! #RIPBILLYMAYS #NEVERFORGET

>Depress self >Start crying >Notice tears don't taste salty >TO THE GOOGLES >Depression canceled due to science #nerd

According to cursebird.com, people on Twitter don't use bollocks enough. I'm going to replace FUCK with BOLLOCKS from now one. BOLLOCKS YEAH

"I think there are eggnogg people and noneggnogg people." "And which are you?" ".. I'm a fish. ... On a tree." #wut

@jimbobwolfman WHO LIVES ON THE PC TWEETING CONSTANTLY? JIM-BOB-WOLF-MAN :D

Lolwut. @dot_user tweeted something about 'dialup visitors' and I read it as 'dialup vibrator'. Worst. Toy. Ever.

#LastTimeIHadSex ... The last time me and sex were involved, I was conceived. #FuckYeahVirginity

No. No. NO. Jobs is NOT "the reason we have MP3 players" you stupid bimbo. He's the reason they got popular but he did not invent them D:<

Someone on Etsy is selling a .pdf to teach you how to use Twitter hashtags to promote your business. .. Why.